Oh, wow, ciel! That was wonderful. I love the connection you made between Dean and the empaths. I would love to see canon Sam make the connection and see all the things Dean has done and acknowledge it.

Very creative, too, the whole curse thing.

Spectacular! Awesome job, guys.  Keep up the good work and I'll be waiting with bated breath for the next!

Nicole

Okay, I opened a Word document so I could respond to this as I went. I knew I’d never remember it all, being of faulty memory.

First off, I totally bow at your ability to use metaphor for description. Right off, I was so impressed at your word choices and visual pictures. My first thoughts were:

“Oh, there you are. I missed you. That’s the storyteller that leaves me in AWE.”

Great pick up, having him already know something is missing. Very smart writing, there.

This line is like listening to perfectly timed and phrased music: “Clouds traveled over the rising moon, light hitting the clearing, giving the edges of the trees, the bike, and the woman a soft, silver-white halo. Dean felt himself sway and pulled in a lungful of air, grimacing as he felt his chest pull and stretch, fighting back the cough that licked the heels of his breath.”

I LOVE that you describe Sam’s eyes as blue-green.  I have a peeve about people saying they're brown. Thank you for that *grins*.

Oh, good lord, the angst and pain. You do it so well! Teach me, I am your student.

And, your Dean voice is excellent as always. I can hear him in your words.

Ah, you’ve also noticed his scar under his eyes. Most people talk about the one on his chin, but not the eye one.  I keep insisting its there. And, very nice keeping his forehead scar.

She’s a master, folks, watch her soar…

“Images slammed into him like physical blows, sweat breaking out on his forehead, upper lip, back. Impossible, unrealistic images of wolves shifting, twisting, turning into man, of a sweet-faced woman suddenly sprouting menacing, deadly fangs, of a wasted, withered man in a hooded robe leaning over a child, of an ancient, hollow-eyed figure turning away from him and fading.

Nausea rolled through him, causing him to press his lips together. He began to shake, sweating and freezing at once. His hands slipped on the edge of the sink and he went to his knees gasping for breath, the pressure in his head growing.

He bit his lip until he could taste the slick copper of blood in his mouth. Pale, haunted faces shimmered and shook toward him, skeletal remains burned, furniture flew across rooms, giant creatures with talons for hands roared in a darkened cave…”

Loved that.

Ph-rawr! Dean in the shower…is it hot in here?

Brilliantly awesome in its brilliant awesomeness.  See, I have no adequate words. I love it!

Hugs,

Nicole

First of all, Dean on a motorcycle…hot! Reminds me of Jensen’s Alec days.

Oooo, I knew the moment I heard the blisters needed cleaning it wouldn’t be good. 

I really liked this part:

“A slick sheen of sweat instantly covered his body as his legs disappeared and he sat down, hard, on the motel room floor in front of Sam. His brother's strong hands held tight to his upper arms, but he didn't feel the contact. He couldn't hear Sam's voice telling him to take it easy, easy… just breath, okay, I’ve got you… he couldn't see his brother's frightened eyes. He saw only the holes in his memory filling in with the devastating truth.”

A very nice visual. And I loved you referencing us back to the pilot…actually, I enjoyed the whole remembering scene very much.

And, we just watched Papillon not that long ago.

Awesome ending, not disappointed in the slightest...no worries, my dear, it was a great read. Can't believe you did that all in one sitting, though. Whew!  

Aww, I felt so sorry for Dean when Sam ruined his enjoyment of the pie. I love cherry pie, btw, and now my mouth is watering. Thanks guys, lol.

Oh, Dean. God didn't lock you out...you locked Him out. So sad.

Very good, girls. Banter from the boys was great, recognized lines from the show...still think it's uber eerie about the spoilers. You've set up a nice mystery here and I can tell that you've put a considerable amount of thought into it. Nice tension between the boys. All in all, this felt like an actual episode.

Bring on Wednesday! Yea!


Author's Response:

That pie was all sj -- she made me actually consider baking. Note the "consider"... ;)

I think you're dead-on with Dean and God... I think he's going to go through a bit of the valley of the shadow before he sees any light on the other side -- and I don't just mean in this story. I think that might be the case in the show, too. But I guess we'll have to wait and see!

I'm glad you like the banter and can see this like an actual episode. We work hard to make the rhythm seem as natural as possible, so yay!

Wednesday is coming soon... Can't wait to see what you think!

Slainte,

GS and SJ

*crowd jumps to their feet and roars*

Applause, ladies!!! That confrontation between the boys was indescribable. I was just blown away by it and enjoyed every second. You know, the two of you are just a perfect writing team. Again, I can't say enough about how well you've put this thing together...building the suspense, building the clues, unfolding it all slowly while keeping up the interest level.

Give yourselves a big, well-deserved pat on the back. I can't wait for the weekend. I know, I mean I just KNOW I'm gonna eat it up and beg for more!

Love ya both,

Nicole

P.S. No apologizing about being "late." It was worth the wait and you've both been busy...you have a life and that's a good thing. No apology is necessary at all. We should just be grateful you work so hard on these things...putting your heart into it like you do. 

(((HUGS))) 

Oh gosh, you guys, I'm sooo sorry I haven't reviewed yet, I read this sometime Sunday, but was so intent on laying down that I told myself I'd leave a review later. Honestly, I've felt like crap for almost two weeks and it just left me exhausted this week...so forgive me? *grins*

OF COURSE, it was another awesome chapter filled with intrigue and action in equal doses. I admit that I was a little sad that the evil thing turned out to be an angel (I have a soft spot for angels), but I kinda suspected as much after the last chapter.

Anyway, you guys are amazing as ever and I look forward to the next one!

Take care,

Nicole

Good job, girls! Your research and planning really shows through...the plot and every chapter building the story forward step by step. You have given us good brotherly banter, intense canon-character emotions and reactions and some great angst and hurt/comfort. Take a well-deserved break and celebrate a job well done.

Author's Response:

Nicole -- thanks so much! We are both so glad you've been reading and that you take time to not only post this review, but to review on multiple sites as well! That is so appreciated.

I'm not so sure about a break, though. :) Writing has kept me sane when life has tried to turn me inside out. And now that SJ is writing for the VS... I don't except she'll have many breaks for a bit. :)

Thanks for the "job well done" comment, though. That means a lot coming from you.

Best always,

Gaelic and SJ

Well, crap...I never got back to this. Everybody's already pretty much covered it all anyway and you KNOW I LOVE this. Thank you for writing it...it was beautiful.

(((HUGS)))

*Gasps* NO! Not Sammy! I can honestly say I didn't see that coming. I figured if it took anyone, it'd be Dean. And, wow, what a chapter! It was such a pleasure to read, I just zoomed right through it. I swear its not possible for you to get better and then I read a chapter like this and think, "Man, she just keeps getting better."

Very nicely done. The opening scene was aptly creepy, the bar scene was full of tension and then the scene between Sam and Dean was tender and lovely. Great job, friend, great job! And we still have FOUR more chapters to go--excellent!

And don't worry about your updates, you have a LOT on your plate right now, I don't think ANYone has any idea and if they did, they sure wouldn't fault you for it.

I'm just in total awe that you're able to balance it all! You should be called Wonder Woman and rather than Gaelic for all you have to keep up with.  You're still in my thoughts and I sure hope things get better/easier soon.

Nicole