I like this chapter. After the intensity of the previous - lots of action and emotional highs - your meander, Sam's meander placed us well to understand, to feel, the drag of time and the out of control feeling of helplessness.

Plus, Dean's snark is always a bit of a treat!!!

fan-freakin-tastic work!

Author's Response: lol - thanks :)

"Careful with the merchandise" hee hee.

Author's Response: He he - glad you liked that bit! Thanks!

So Dean’s sick, cooped up and not getting his own way! No wonder you wrote a moody, grumpy Dean. Loved this line from Sam’ - “Just let me know when you stop being all pi$$y so we can come up with our next move, besides this PMS of yours is bugging the hell out of me.” Everyone now and then Sam trumps Dean with snark one-upmanship and this line of yours was a classic!Awesome description to depict Dean’s dream - “…before the pain took full control of his senses, turning him deaf and dumb and blind…” his pain and fear is tangible. Great job!And gotta tell you, Dean playing with fire (literally!) in the middle of the night in morbid fascination was downright creepy, major eerie!!And to conclude with our beautiful Sammy ensuring that they were at peace as brothers, apologising and explaining, and Dean responding to comfort and accept, was divine.

Author's Response:

I also love how you pull out certain lines that you liked :) It encourages me to put similar things in later. He he, glad you liked them - Sam can totally trump Dean sometimes... not all the time, but sometimes.

And Dean playing with fire - I had that wrote down from an early point so it was just a matter of time before I'd managed to include it, yey!  

Thanks!

WOW, this was an awesome chapter! This whole fic has been intriguing, compelling, but the STYLE of ch one is wicked. The way you interspersed those unbelievably appropriate lyrics, both boys’ intense thoughts and THEN the surprise of the YED’s observations – outstanding! All interwoven to create a complete picture in my head.  Loved the cute one liners, the digs about “does my bum look big?” and “that’s not how compliments work” for a bit of Winchester fun. This description was vivid in portraying evil, malicious intent – “Tension was slowly building between the two, hiding behind false smiles; they were keeping things from each other. They were scared. He smiled at the thought. If they were scared that meant they were vulnerable too. He cocked his head to the side as he watched the youngest open the door for the eldest, his yellow eyes glistening in the distance but unseen by the two hunters.” – not to mention just downright kicka$$ writing.  Add in YED’s analysis of the dark places in Dean’s mind, his conclusion that two Winchesters are better than one, and THAT lyric as a last word and you’ve got a stunning piece of work!

Author's Response:

Thanks! I thought I'd try something different... I always like doing that, and this time I decided, hmmm. lyrics! So I'm glad you liked them and you thought it worked. I love Nickelback and that's definately one of my favourite songs.

I love adding the YED's point of view... he's so evil its fun!!! >:D  I miss him... kinda...

She's an angel?? Dean traded an angel when he was only 5?? Holy Sh1t! Another deal to save Sammy?? Dean is a link between angels and fire?? My head is spinning - I have a bucket of questions!!

Your flashback was divine. John's handling of his little boy and his grief for Mary triggered by tucking Dean in was beautifully written. Thanks *wistful smile*

Dean blurting "I'm bringing a girl back to the motel" no wonder he got the response he did from Sam!

That was CHILLING Rae! Very intense. Dean's reaction to the reminder that he traded his guardian angel was so well done - shock, disbelief...Her taunting words of what could have been rubbing it in. But we know that as horrible as that trade is, Dean would have no regrets if it saved Sammy. But as usual, everything Dean does has a high price for himself.

And your peek at the real Angel as you allowed us to steal a look through the possession "oh God, Dean...No..no...I'm sorry" as she tried to catch his unfocussed eyes" My heart in tatters for both Dean and the Angel.

Your ending was absolutely kicka$$! What an eerie but fabulous suggestion. "...if I can turn him, then you'll follow' - How to get Sam leading the army because of his loyalty and love for Dean, how to get Dean protecting Sam in that role because of his loyalty and love for Sam *Awesome*

And THAT line - "Sam, you're my favourite" mega creepy in the show, mega creepy in your fic.

It's hotting up again, no pun intended!!! Top job!

And these things just pop in your head?!?! *overwhelmed*

Magic work Bambers. Each one of these little oneshots of your just packs a punch that gets me everytime. Without exception.

This was absolutely everything Dean. I really loved your style - Dean's recollection followed by his reflection A.W.E.S.O.M.E. You covered everything Dean does, thinks, feels in one fell swoop. Your talent knows no bounds and I am awe.

Holy Moly! This just doesn't get any easier...

No matter how much we see it, read it, write it... and I've done all that - we are shattered every time.

I think you have hit the nail on the head  - this intense anger beneath his despair, hurt, loss and pain is the what overwhelmes Dean. Will we ever get over that heartfelt cry "What am I supposed to do?"

Your words "Do you know what he did Dad? He ran, he fought..." and Dean is right, you are right, cos if Sam was gonna go darkside killing Jake would have been a done deal.

Very intense, very sad but very true. This is a very well thought out  little ficlet.

I stumbled on this wonderful little fic on my way to Mesmorised after our little online chat and got so sidetracked...

loved it. Your write with flair and conviction. The best part? When Dean pulled up in the impala, mad as sh*t, but totally und erstanding and ready to get on with it. Sam's utter shock at seeing him was beautifully written.

I loved "Heart" - that single defining tear, that all knowing flinch - but this one-shot as an alternative was awesome. You nailed it girl!

I just loved this take on the deal. How perceptive of you to see, to help us see, Dean's perspection of happiness that things actually worked out right. I have been on the maudlin side but yes, the idea that Dean can now l(in your fantastic words) live life released of his burdens, the life of a free man, and that Sam can make his life happy is a revelation. Your Winchester connection via the hugs and silent communication, all with the very astute Bobby watching on was magic - well written, very creative, I was "just there". Thanks for the great read, the great angle!

Author's Response:

Thanks so much for the wonderful review.  Now that we are into the season and seeing how the show is handling it, it is interesting to revisit this story. I only hope the show gives us some emotional hugs or bonding between the brothers eventually.

I do think Dean feels a tremendous release and is not focusing on the year down the road, he is living in the moment and relishing not having all those pressures on him. 

The new pressures of facing his impending death is coming, but he still has the joy of knowing Sammy is alive.  That trumps any other feelings he may have down the line.

Thanks again, B.J.

Am I allowed to review twice?? I have come back to your incredible story and to get my bearings I re-read ch1 and although I sure meant what I said in my review, I don’t think I did you or your story justice. So with your permission I’m gunna double dip (no Double-Mint pun intended!!):Your account of the hunt as your opening was riveting – straight into the action and an eye full of Winchester insync.. I just loved how you had the boys reading each others faces, utterances and responding instinctively to keep each other safe. Your words -“Rock and a hard place, eh, Sammy? Do your stuff, man, I got your back.” - had me in the palm of your hand cos I so love Dean at his wisecracking best – especially when it’s also part of his mask to suck up his fear that Sam was in danger. Sam’s reflections to lament Dean always putting himself in the line of fire as a deliberate choice to keep Sam out of it was brilliantly written – my tummy clenched with Sam’s.Just loved Dean and his Tonka toy, testosterone and petrol a lethal mix guanteed to surface the little boy – and we all know how high Dean’s ‘play’ factor is!!Your description of Dylan’s demise was chilling and I paid more attention this time. Feels like our boys are heading for a world of trouble. This was beautifully written to portray immense sadness as well, as you covertly let us know he was part of a loving family, so it was evil at its worst. Awesome work, especially as this was your first chappie fic. You are nailing it. Heading for the next button with enthusiasm but trepitation…

Author's Response:

Petra, I said it once and I'll say it again...your reviews blow me away....i'm not sure I can find the right words to thank you for your beautiful evaluation of chapter one ....

To have a reader/reviewer who reads so intently and absorbs the content and the pictures within those words is every writer's dream come true.....thank you...wish we could give our reviewers stars.....

How sweet and gorgeous is your Billy Lee Billings? I was smitten. But as I read of course, I just knew that “bad” was imminent for our perfect-marriage-couple, you made it too good to be true.  And then we read further and find out he can cook, he buys flowers, he’s organised in kitchen, *sigh* oh no Jude’s got evil on her mind … I loved the easy banter between our boys, relaxed, comfortable, AND kicking backi n a classy restaurant. Your standout line was Dean reminiscing about good times with his Dad – “Dean chuckled, smiling boyishly at a memory only he could see” – just a lovely phrasing to describe a happy place. And speaking of clever writing “demonic tenant” very cool! Sam’s “I swear to God, Dean, if they could find a way to deep fry lettuce, I might get you to eat salads!” was a classic, what a hoot! Soo Sam AND soo Dean in one creative sentence. Bravo for the Winchester fix for this chapter.  But let’s serious here. That murder scene was one of the most horrific, graphic, cold-blooded, cold-hearted descriptions EVER!! *shudder* … author's intent achieved with 100% accuracy – we’re all freaked out!!

Author's Response:

Sorry if the Billings couple was a bit 'over the top' but had to make the murder soooo out of character that Dean and Sam would KNOW there was more to it......

Glad you liked the dining experience.... was pretty proud of that section myself....and yes, I believe that while Sam only concentrates on the negatives with John , Dean CHOOSES to see a different side of their Dad.......       and yes, I was proud of that rather numbing murder...