Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 22/02/12 05:52 PM · On: Chapter 3
the whole corporeal ass thing and the Yoda references and Dean's sarcasm were fabulous! It was the gem of this chapter. I couldn't help laughing. This keeps getting better and better. I love how Sam became evil. He didn't give into it, it sort of took him over. Cool! And at the end, Dean's ready to get down to business.
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 22/02/12 05:44 PM · On: Chapter 2
Loved it! Your first ever story is a big success! 'refusing to take his eyes away from his brother's still form as penance for moving away.' Liked that one! Full of guilt. The boys laughing over Sam being Chewie was a nice touch. I could visualize it in my head. Yay! One of the criteria I look for in every story is Dean's sonuvabitch. Give that girl a blue ribbon. Oh my gosh! A cliffhanger. So what was it? Did something suck Dean's soul from him? Or maybe it's inside him? I know. Keep reading.
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 22/02/12 05:25 PM · On: Chapter 1
Great! When Sam tells Dean that he can still hear him begging to die... shivers. That stopped me dead. Oooh! This is gonna be good! Bring on the guilt and the angst.
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 09/07/09 07:00 PM · On: Chapter 3
I like that you refer to Dena's favorite curse as his mantra. "...the springs of the old tick mattress seeping from its seams like a wound." Just another example of the amazing gift you have for painting word pictures. "...which in theory was really confusing because apparently he already WAS dead." thanks for clearing that up for me. I thought he was dead. This just makes everything a little more bizarre! Wicked good! Wow! What a complex storyline! I can't wait to read more so ...post again soon PLEASE!
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 09/07/09 06:49 PM · On: Chapter 2
This is an intriguing story! I love the switch up on the road! Just when you think the drama has passed it unexpectedly amps up again. And the Star Wars reference was hilarious! My husband gave me a strange look when I laughed after reading that Sam is Chewie. How appropriate! Why didn't we see it before? You express the feelings and thoughts of the two men so well that I feel like I'm part of them.
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 09/07/09 06:37 PM · On: Chapter 1
Fabulous! You have such a visual style of writing! I can see it in my head, feel the pull on my feet and the dryness on my tongue. Excellently done! "The fear and desolation as palatable in the air as the dust in his dry mouth." I had to roll my tongue around my mouth to build up some moisture after reading this. Great impact!
Reviewer: hellioness (Signed) · Date: 19/07/08 02:00 PM · On: Chapter 3
Stories that jump around tend to confuse me, yet I found this fic fascinating. Please update soon.
Reviewer: fantasycatcher (Signed) · Date: 10/01/08 02:07 PM · On: Chapter 1
What a unique and capturing way to open a story. I love that! Look forward to seeing where it goes. Schelz
Reviewer: zarine (Signed) · Date: 13/11/07 10:25 PM · On: Chapter 3
i love this whole idea, so sad though anyways you shud so totally let us know whats going on with this cuz i love it!
Reviewer: d6l2j7 (Signed) · Date: 21/10/07 03:19 PM · On: Chapter 3
This a really cool story. I like the back and forth effect between that present and the future. Can't wait to see what happens next.
Reviewer: Cookie6 (Signed) · Date: 19/10/07 06:32 AM · On: Chapter 3
Boy is this one screwin' with my head. Of course the only way to torment Dean, even in Hell, especially for eternity, is to torture and torment Sam. Very intense and dark, but very creative. Looking forward to finding out what the "wait" is. great job. ...oh and the Chewie? of course! Perfect analogy for Sam. Why didn't we see it? Lucky for us you did!!
Reviewer: Magos186 (Signed) · Date: 02/09/07 04:14 PM · On: Chapter 3
this story is soo awesome! i love that you keep going back between the future and the present and show what each brother is experiencing. I also love the whole twin thing explanation. This is so interesting and i can't wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response: Magos186 so glad you like it. I get bored easily so I like to jump around...it keeps things interesting. Twins are fascinating. You should meet mine, she's invisible.
Reviewer: gengen0776 (Signed) · Date: 02/09/07 03:35 PM · On: Chapter 3
Awesome GTS! again I loved the star wars references! This chapter was very informative I thought...giving just enough to rope us in! Happy you kept it up because you are one awesome fledgling author! I look forward to beta'ing your next chapters so keep'em coming! And I really like the boy too his interaction with Dean is great!
Author's Response: The boy isn't quite as interesting as the Impala's steering wheel but.....it seems to work. Just started a new job so it may be a bit before I get the next chap to ya.
Reviewer: ShinyWinchesterGun (Signed) · Date: 02/09/07 02:41 PM · On: Chapter 3
Hey, nice recap! This boy is an intriguing character...I like how he sort of explains everything that happened while still being all "mysterious and annoying"...hee...nice job! Looking forward to another chapter!
Author's Response: Good someone liked the boy! I was worried he might be too annoying:) Thanks for the read.
Reviewer: gengen0776 (Signed) · Date: 27/08/07 07:10 PM · On: Chapter 2
Well I already told you what I thought but I figured it deserved repeating. Great job, well written and I LOVE the star wasr refrences! Keep up the good word! And thanks for giving me props on the beta-ing! I appreciate that you appreciate it!
Author's Response: Gengen, I appreciate that you appreciate my appreciating you...well you get the idea:) Thanks for all you help! GTS
Reviewer: ShinyWinchesterGun (Signed) · Date: 27/08/07 08:41 AM · On: Chapter 2
Oh my! Poor Sammy! I love your little flashbacks...the Millennium Falcon...totally...!!!! So, hope you put up another chapter soon! This is very, very interesting!
Author's Response: Yes, I must admit I am a Star Wars Geek. Next chapter up in a few days.
Reviewer: ShinyWinchesterGun (Signed) · Date: 26/08/07 07:31 PM · On: Chapter 1
Oh no!!!! Please write more soon--this is really fascinating!!!!!!!! Ahhhh!!!! Okay, add in however many exclamation marks you feel like...they'll keep on coming...must know what happens next!!! (Also, this is extremely good for something you just randomly wrote and didn't beta...wonderful job!!!!)
Author's Response: ShinyWinchesterGun if you liked the first chapter, you'll love the rest. I have to say I wasn't really happy with the first one ....but wait it gets better:) Next chapter up now!
Reviewer: ShinyWinchesterGun (Signed) · Date: 22/08/07 10:25 PM · On: Chapter 1
Oh my! I am VERY intrigued by this! I hope you continue soon, I would very much like to know what is going to happen! Ahhhh...poor Dean...poor Sam...so much horror and angst...wow, you write good! If my ramblings don't make much sense, basically I'm praising you and begging for more...!
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked the first chapter. I love me some angst! The next chapter will be up in a day or two...just doing a little tweekin:)
Reviewer: supernaturalpass (Signed) · Date: 19/08/07 11:51 PM · On: Chapter 1
Hmm, you've got me really wondering here. I can't wait for an update!
Author's Response: Thanks, I'll try not to disappoint. The next chapter should be up by the end of the week.....hopefully:)
Reviewer: fredo (Signed) · Date: 18/08/07 03:01 PM · On: Chapter 1
surely a bit confusing but an interesting idea. Are you considering to add other chapters ? I know it's not easy, i posted my first chapter only a few days ago. And a good beta can be very usuful to help you get your ideas staight. Anyway, will check from time to time to see if that first attempt will be followed by a second...
Author's Response: It all sounded so much better in my head. I HOPE to have more coming--this time with a beta. Don't give up on me yet. *silently groveling*
Reviewer: ciel4 (Signed) · Date: 17/08/07 06:41 PM · On: Chapter 1
Oh, that was too painful! But what an awesome first effort GTS! It's scary to post a story, isn't it? But I'm so glad you did. Well done!
Author's Response: Thanks ciel4, coming from you that it such a compliment! GTS
Reviewer: Armaita (Signed) · Date: 17/08/07 02:31 PM · On: Chapter 1
GotTheShining, I love how dark and twisted this is! Dean always seems to assume the best of Sammy, which isn't fair to Sam as a character (no human is entirely good nor completely evil). Great to see someone write up what it would take to send Sam 'dark-side'. Please keep writing!
Author's Response: Armaita, guess I'm a little twisted. Your right, Dean tends to assume he knows best....but what happens if he's wrong?? Everyone has the potential for great deeds or great evil and sometimes "the path to hell is paved with good intentions". Thanks for the encouragement. It means a lot!
Reviewer: stranded_chess_piece (Signed) · Date: 17/08/07 04:54 AM · On: Chapter 1
Oh yikes, I hope the boys have a happier ending than this one! For a first attempt at writing this is really good. Keep it up :)
Author's Response: Don't worry it was just a "possible" future. There may be some hope yet! Thanks for reviewing. Comments are cookies!
Reviewer: catchme21 (Signed) · Date: 16/08/07 10:45 PM · On: Chapter 1
Pure awesomeness for your first try! There was a lot of darkness, and it showed a path we all fear Sam might take if Dean does end up...*gulp* Lol we all know Kripke wouldn't do that to us...he couldn't... It was a bit confusing though. Did Dean come back? He was dead, and Sam knew he was dead, yet he was able to reach out and grab him, so Dean wasn't a spirit. And Sam said "I can control them all." Is he ruler of the demons now so to speak? He had a vision of Meg doing something to someone, but he's not going to do anything about it. It was really good, I think it could just use a little more filler and a bit of a plumper backstory as to how all of the characters ended up the way they did. Hope you write again soon! :) Cuz that was pretty good.
Author's Response: Glad you liked it. Didn't really intend for it to be so dark it just kinda took on a life of its own. Dean was actually alive sent forward in time. The future Evil!Sam's Dean was being turtured in hell. Meg was torturing this Dean and Sam could feel it. "I can control them all" could be all Sam's powers, all the demons......you'll just have to wait and see:) Sorry it was confusing. I'll be writing more which should clear up the details. Don't think I can just leave it the way it is.
Reviewer: gengen0776 (Signed) · Date: 16/08/07 07:37 PM · On: Chapter 1
It was very interesting but a little random...the emotion was there but...were they in hell? Did Sam kill himself to get there? Did he come back wrong the way the YED said? What was his vision? It was well written but there are a lot of unanswered questions...and it needs a little more set up... Keep it up tho this shows promise and with a good Beta you'll be kicking butt and taking names!
Author's Response: Yeh, I should have used a Beta I just knew if I didn't get it out there I would wimp out and not post. To answer your questions, They are on Earth in the future showing what would happen in a few years if they are unable to break the deal with RED. Sam tries to kill himself when he discovers that he can feel Dean being tortured in hell. Sam turned evil just before he pulled the trigger. I had a whole story in my head that would have set it up and explained it better but I thought it was too ambitious for my first time. Gengen0076, Thanks so much for taking the time to critique. GTS
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