Reviewer: sam (Signed) · Date: 13/11/11 08:10 AM · On: Chapter 1

crying inside ... mizpaah ... why hurt him so badly ... why couldn't uncle bobby and dean find a better way to get Sammy out... plea ppleas dont be mat at ? ing you .... i red this powerfull story for times and it still hurts...pleas etell me that he comes BACK HOME TO US...i will do anything to help out...i undersand whet he is going thru... no pain and no more hurt...i always had a hart for my KING/PRINCE SAMMMY ... sorry ... yolu have mad it so real and i love that ... please dont ever stop writing literature that makes one become deeply to the stroy and is a character that invelopes to the story passage. thank you many blessing to yourthought path and family. Love you deerly, and applaude you. If i ask you two to three things in mind please dont be upset...

can i get a copy of this story please ... i will leave my email ... pissedsam74@yahoo.com

another is if there where a way that one can change the rating numeration to maybe both numeration and or words.

Also, im sorry that im asking but please dont ever stop existing from this sight ... you have been the first professional writer that i grew up with to enjoy and love the emaculate stories that you bring for one to read and if there is a way that i can send you a more then trillion thank yous ... from a dying fanatic ... thank you for blessing mw with your stories.

RATING: ETERNAL EMACULATE LITTERAUTRE. :)

Reviewer: sam (Signed) · Date: 04/02/11 06:20 AM · On: Chapter 2

its me agin jules i love it, an and and i hope that there is more to this one...i do want sam to be well, but i am yerning and wanting more and im sorry for asking you this...may you sand me this copy please.

This is a dream of beautifull literature that should be made for SUPERNATURAL TV. i leave you my email ivonne_sammmmy69@yahoo.com

i enjoyed the part of sam's persistance of asking but at the same time bearring his thoughts of not getting close to that wall i love it and please let me know of the next chapter to this GOSPEL of WONDERFUL LITERATURE please.

Thank you, and bless not only your family. As well as that GOLDEN HEART & SOUL of your writing. I applaude you deeply once again....

MY RATING: ETERNAL BIND OF GOLDEN SPIRITED LITERATURE 

that only ancitet gods and godess can only imagen to have, but never will. Thank you.

Author's Response:

Hullo, Ivonne,

You should have your copy by now to hug to your heart's content.

And yes, I'm with you - I want Sam to be whole and well, and back with his brother. But I can't help thinking he's going to scratch that wall....

Thanks for that, hun. I'm really glad you loved it so much. Hope you're taking care of yourself, and that your back has settled down now.

Jules

Reviewer: cesh10 (Signed) · Date: 02/02/11 06:09 PM · On: Chapter 2

I really liked it. Thanks

Author's Response:

Thank you for that. And welcome to the site - hope you have lots of pleasant hours here reading all the awesome fics.

It wasn't something I planned, but I couldn't resist the challenge when Oceane emailed me - I'm just a sucker like that - LOL.

And as I've said to other reviewers, it was an interesting challenge to see if I could tie it all together with the three points of view.

Thanks again for reading, and for letting me know what you thought. I'm really chuffed that you enjoyed it.

Jules

Reviewer: Primrose (Signed) · Date: 01/02/11 02:53 PM · On: Chapter 2

OH yeah!  Yes, exactly right.  Bobby SHOULD have troubles dealing with Sam, and Sam SHOULD be bothered by the wall and the "itch".  Well done!  

I really wish there had been a new episode last week!  This week I'm at a storytelling conference and won't be home to see the episode :(   

Author's Response:

Hi, Jules,

Oh, no! You're going to miss it! Well, if it's any consolation, I haven't seen it yet either. Am making plans to view it on the weekend, because I'm dying to see what all the hype from my discussion group is about - lol.

And yes, I agree with you. I think Bobby would be uneasy around Sam, especially at the start, and I do also think that Sam won't be able to stop himself picking at the wall, possibly in a frustrated effort to fill in the blanks. Sam's always had to have all the facts - he's never been comfortable with gaps or missing information. It's just that the consequences this time will be more than he can deal with...

Hope the storytelling conference went well, and that you came away with some good tips, etc. And thanks for letting me know what you thought of this - really glad you enjoyed it.

Jules

Reviewer: Oceane (Signed) · Date: 30/01/11 10:02 PM · On: Chapter 2

What an amazing story you gave us Jules. I'm never tired to see Dean in big brother mode. Dean telling Sam about his other self, who fooled him and Bobby was a great idea, so it help Sam to not feel guilty. The brothers are finally reunited but it's not the end, Sam must not to succumb to his curiosity and try to know what behind his wall in his head and Dean is worried what going to happen to Sam if his wall crumbled. Outstanding work Jules, thank you for the present.   

Author's Response:

What an amazing carrot you dangled in front of me, hun! LOL. You waved that 'angst' word around, and you must have known I'd just have to grab it and see what I could do.

Oh, I know what you mean - Dean in big brother mode is what made me fall in love with him right back in the Pilot. And I actually hashed out what Dean would be likely to say to Sam, then edited a whole lot out because I thought oh, crap, if he tells him that, he'll bring down the wall himself! So that little conversation underwent some pretty major tweaking - glad it all worked out all right.

So thrilled you enjoyed your present. It was fun, actually, putting it all together. And first person seemed just the right way to tell it.

And yeah, I think we all are waiting for Sam to scratch....even though we dread the end result...

hugs

Jules

Reviewer: Deanwinchesterfan1985 (Signed) · Date: 29/01/11 09:36 PM · On: Chapter 2

Great story, Jules! I really enjoyed it and it was really nice to take some time out for myself and enjoy something like this after an extremely busy week, especially since they rescheduled the new episode for next week and I won't get the chance to see it. Not until the 7th at least. But again wonderful job on this, I loved your take on how Sam would react when he woke up in the panic room. I know this will be AU when the episode aires next week but for me you made it very believable and I hope that the episode will be half as good as this story was. Thank you for the ride and I hope that you are doing ok after the flood you are in my prayers as well and I hope to catch up with some more of your work in a couple weeks after I get our new place set up and when I have the time. Oh and the e-mail you are using to send me the attatchments is fine - I use both e-mails on a regular basis so either one is fine. :) Take care!

Author's Response:

Hi, Candace,

It's the 10th, and I still haven't seen the new eppy yet...*sigh*....got to love technology...

Thanks so much for that. It just made sense to me that Sam would perhaps need that transition time - time to reset, as it were. And yes, Show has knocked the story into AU, so I marked it as that to save time - lol.

I'm really glad you enjoyed the convoluted ride with Sam slowly reconnecting and regaining his thought processes.

Floods missed my place, but it was still really hard to watch all the devastation going on in Brisbane and surrounding areas. Seeing places I knew go under, and being cut off for a night until the water started receding.

Good luck with the move, hun, I hope that everything goes smoothly as possible for you.

hugs

Jules

Reviewer: gidgetgal9 (Signed) · Date: 29/01/11 11:15 AM · On: Chapter 2

I was disappointed not to have a new episode but having this update helped make up for it.  I'll tell ya, it is fic like yours that has made hiatus survivable. 

This was so awesome and touched on the many things that I would like to see on the show, but know with the time restraints- probably won't be touched on.  Though I must say from what I've read things are going to be a bit more covered than I thought.  I hated that they dragged out and in some ways glossed over Dean's time in hell and so I'm afraid that things will be the same for this story line... only time will tell.

And you touched on the one thing that just kills me.  The Bobby and Sam relationship and how it has to be damaged.  I wouldn't blame Bobby for taking a step back- I would expect it but man it kills me.  I had always thought that Bobby loved the boys equally, especially when he stood up to Dean about the demon detox.  But then ... I guess things have fallen apart.  I guess I will look forward to that relationship being mended on the show and in fic!

I'll stop babbling- but just know I look forward to another fic from you!  Thanks for sharing this one.  And again- the banner is just - wow! :) Claudia

Author's Response:

Hi, Claudia,

Yes, it was a bit disappointing, especially since we were all so geared up for it, but at least we got it this week. And thank you - I'm glad I made the hellatus a bit more bearable.

I've yet to watch the eppy, actually. Just had too much going on over the weekend, and it was way too hot in the office to sit there and watch it. But I'll get to it - and from the clips I've seen, you're right - looks like they are going to show some aftermath stuff and not just skip to Sam's all right now and ready to hunt.

And yes, I know what you mean. I've read some spoilers and deduced that Bobby will have a hard time accepting Sam back. And you know, I just feel so sorry for Sam. I know he did the wrong thing in trusting Ruby and going against his brother, but I see him as a boy who was always the odd one out - always on the outside looking in, and wishing he could belong somewhere. And when I hear things like Bobby and Cass saying that they'd always had a stronger relationship with Dean, that just makes my heart ache all the more for Sam, the perennial misfit.

I'm hoping that Bobby will eventually forgive him and move on, strengthening his relationship with our Sam now that he's back, and that Sam himself will come to a better understanding of himself and where he fits in.

Thanks, hun, so glad you liked it so much.

Jules 

Reviewer: supernaturaldh (Signed) · Date: 28/01/11 07:55 PM · On: Chapter 2

Oh Jules , I loved this.  Just what I needed since the pushed the show back a week.  Something to occupy my mind. Great story.  Denise

Author's Response:

Hey, Denise!

I owe you an email - life's been a bit nutty lately. Got your flood information and will respond this week, hopefully.

So glad you liked this, hun. Oceane wanted an angsty story, and I had to admit, it was meaty stuff she gave me to play with. I didn't think Sam would just pop awake all better and ready to go hunting with big bro, so I just let my imagination play for a bit, and this is what it came up with.

Thanks so much for reading, hun.

hugs,

Jules

Reviewer: vonnie836 (Signed) · Date: 28/01/11 12:44 PM · On: Chapter 2

So here we are again and like last week, I'm completely blown away by this. How do you do this? My mind is going a thousand miles per hour and I have a hard time keeping it together here. Well, I'll try. So at the risk of rambling or sounding insane, here we go.

Sam, he is starting to get better, his thoughts are making more sense. Even though he still uses not wake, not hard, he comes up with the right words right afterwards. He feels comfortable and remembers the couch, but he also remembers Death and what he said about the wall, although it's still far off in his memory. Sadly he can distinguish between Dean's anger and Bobby's anger and knows that the latter was somehow directed against him. It is very clearly confusing to him.

Dean, he sees Bobby is angry and understands why and I think it is great, how he is trying to defend his own actions to himself. He followed his gut instinct and knows he did the right thing by bringing Sam upstairs, but seeing Bobby this way makes him question himself. Love all the arguments he brings up to why he did the right thing. In the end, he knows what is best for Sam. It's great to see that he gets Bobby's issues though. And he get's Sam's problem, how he just needs time to reconnect to before the cage and how the traumatic events of hell are there and influence him, even though he can't remember them. He understands, because he's been there.

Bobby, gotta love the guy. He is clearly feeling guilty that he can't forget what RoboSam tried to do to him. Initially he tries to justify his desire to keep Sam in the panic room with the need to keep Sam from hurting himself, but he gives that up right away and confesses to himself what his issue is. Yet he is still worried about the boy, clearly loves him. When he sees Sam recognized him being angry, he pulls himself together, even though he feels he has every right to be angry. But he needs to know if the wall held, just as much as Dean does and he is the one who pushes Dean into asking. And then he doesn't know what to think of the answer. Is it good that Sam neither remembers the wall or what he did to him? Or would it be better he remembered trying to kill him, maybe feel guilty for it?

Sam, the memory of what Death did and said is coming back more clearly, but that's not so much what seems to concern him. He remembers the pain and the bright light and hurting so incredibly much and yet Dean and Bobby stood by and didn't help him. How confusing is that? It has to be outright scary. And into those thoughts comes the horribly loud noise and brightness that scares him, makes him want to hide. Impressions of hell? His mind can't identify what it is, just that he needs to find safety. 

Dean, exhausted to the point that he falls asleep and I have the feeling it's more than just physical. He is carrying quite the load here. And he knows Bobby is having a real problem, doesn't even blame the guy. So he just has to tell him that they will leave, because Sam is his problem. Well Dean, you are wrong. Bobby might have a problem with his feelings about Sam right now, but that doesn't mean he is going to quit being your and Sam's 'father'. He knows both of the boys need him an he is not skipping out on that. The thunderstorm helps Dean to get away, trying to get his thoughts together and yet, everything is forgotten, because Sam is gone. Wow, confused as he is, the kid's hunter instincts must have taken over and he found something to unlock the door. I can feel how scared Dean is at this moment. It's the storm from hell outside and Sam is in the middle of it, confused, scared and alone. No matter what, he has to find him, or at least try.

Bobby, no matter what, he is out there, getting soaked, looking for Sam and it is ironic that he should be the one to find him. But sometimes strange things happen for a purpose. He is the one who coaches Sam out of the car. Just when he things it's not going to happen, the hand comes out and reaches for him. This scared, cold, soaked puppy needs him, trusts him and leans on him. So completely the opposite from the self-assured, emotionless hunter, who tried to kill him for his own gain less than a day ago. I think it's exactly what Bobby needed and when he warns Sam he would call for Dean, he recognizes that it would very likely scare the crap out of the kid, yet he is determined to hold him, no matter what it takes. The picture of Sam leaning against Bobby, his head on is shoulder and the older man holding on to him tightly is just beyond awesome. This shows love that is so great and forgiving and trusting, I don't even know how to describe it. But then Sam starts to asks questions about why Bobby is angry at him, watched him get hurt without helping and this time Bobby is helpless, he just doesn't know what to say. I can just imagine is relieve and gratefulness towards Dean, when the older brother answers instead of him. And there is worry from both of them about how much they can tell, without bringing the wall down, but still satisfy Sam's need. He knows as well as Dean that curiosity is part of Sam. He can't let things go and has to know every detail. It's just who he is. So it's not really a matter of  if, but of when it will happen. In the meantime they can only hope and pray that things will be alright.

Sam, right here he proves how right Bobby is. He knows there is more to it. Living with 18 month of not remembering is going to be tough and he is still trying to reconnect everything that happened before that to now. It's like walking along a road for him. When he turns to look back, there is a wall there and he can't see anything. Now he has to try and find some other roads to let him look around the wall to the other side. Almost like parts of the brain being interrupted by a stroke and now the mind has to find new pathways to reconnect with the parts that weren't damaged. There are memories that make him wonder, looks from Bobby that make him think there is more to this. What did his 'replacement' do to them? He can't let it go, just let it rest, while he is trying to get stronger and  reconnect things. And the thing of getting stronger, well he sees himself and he wonders why he looks the way he does. So many questions and Sam is not the type to leave them unanswered, even if it drives him insane, because as your last sentence say, the itch might just drive him insane before that.

Like I said, you had me going again and my thoughts were just flying away with me. There was so much more here that I wanted to say, but I can't hold on to everything. So I hope this didn't sound to rambled or confused. This is definitely make up for the fact that we won't get the new episode tonight. And I'm looking forward to your next story, next week or whenever it comes. In the meantime, take care of yourself, my friend and thank you for giving me such a ride with this story. Hugs, Vonnie

 

Author's Response:

Whoa....where do I start with such an awesome review, hun.

I am so thrilled and touched that you've gone into such depth of analysis with this. I tried to dig deep into each man's motives, thoughts and feelings, and to have this kind of feedback is like balm to my soul - means I got it right.

And yes, I think Bobby's right, too. I think Sam won't be able to stop himself from scratching, to get at the truth of what has happened to him. The Sam we know from the end of season five wanted so desperately to atone for all he'd done wrong, and this is the Sam we've just gotten back. So I'm thinking in his mind, for him to properly atone, he needs all the facts to know what he is atoning for.

And as I said to Sarah 2, I think, Sam will also be faced with outside influences whose words and interactions with him may contribute to the wall's weakening as well.

But I had to have that Bobby & Sam moment for my own peace of mind, because I do think Bobby will struggle a bit in accepting Sam back. Trust has been broken, not by the Sam we love, but by the soulless body with no moral compass and no compassion to care. It's that face that Bobby sees, not the emotional eyes and bared heart of the kid who took on Lucifer and won.

Thank you so very much, my friend and sister, for a truly awesome analysis.

Jules

Reviewer: leslie92708 (Signed) · Date: 23/01/11 04:04 PM · On: Chapter 1

I'm looking forward to the rest!  I've not read any fics in regard to the return of Sammy's soul.  Soo..If you have any good ones to recommend..I'm up for it!  I'm stll going back to all of you earlier works and catching up that way!  Lucky me! have to get thru Hellatus!

Author's Response:

Thanks, Leslie.

Hmm, there's a good one on ff.net by Kelhome - can't remember the name of it, but I'll track it down for you and let you know. KKBelvis has one too, which is definitely worth a look. 

Still trolling through the old stuff, I see. LOL. You could get lost in there! 

Glad you're enjoying this - hope you like the second part....which will be up in a couple of hours. 

Jules

Reviewer: supernaturalfan (Signed) · Date: 22/01/11 11:42 AM · On: Chapter 1

So glad you decided to wade in with a tag for 6.11. I love to read your perspective on the episodes..and one as important as this one really needed you brand of closure. Thanks to Oceane for a prompt that got you started down this road.

There's always certain lines in your stories that really move me and stand out. This story in no exception. This one did it for me..

"Is presence here. Can hear, can feel. Presence calling-calling. Calling a Sammy.
Long time not Sammy."

An AWWW moment...oh, and this one. Had to laugh, as you captured Dean and Sam perfectly in just one sentence.

"Oh, God, he can bring on a chick-flick moment without sayin' anything. Or it's the freaking dust in the room. Must be the dust."

Can't wait till next Friday. Look forward to your next chapter..and a new episode of Supernatural.

Take care friend,
Jane

Author's Response:

Hi, Jane,

It's all Oceane's fault - ROFL! 

But as you know from past experience, when someone dangles a carrot like that in front of me, I can't help but make a grab for it. 

Aww, I'm really thrilled certain lines really spoke to you like that. I actually tweaked the Long time no Sammy line - can't remember what the original was now, but I know that when I went back to read it, it didn't sit right with me. Looks like my little tweak worked - lol. And I had to have that little acknowledgement of the chick-flick moment that Dean would vehemently deny having. 

Ah, well....new episode.....by now you would have got the news, yes? Argh.....but there will be the final chapter of Bricks, never fear. I won't be pulling a CW on you.

hugs

Jules

Reviewer: ritsam (Signed) · Date: 22/01/11 01:10 AM · On: Chapter 1

Jules... missed you so much!!!!! *hugs you tight*

This story's just... I don't know how to describe in one word...OUTSTANDING!!! God I wish you to be the writer of the original show, you always seem to capture the perfect plot. You know, last night when I read this story, I was discussing with a friend about this one and telling her-when we are all thinking about what would happen when the wall crumbles, but never thought what the consequence will be if the bricks of the wall start to break!! Awesome story, Sam seems so broken inside and trying to protect himself from his own memory!! Poor Dean, he also seems to be breaking apart seeing his beloved Sammy hurting like this. Love Bobby's POV though, I seriously like this old man. Awesome story once again, and as usual....one of my favorites.

Glad you're doing okay, I hope everything will be back to normal soon.

Take Care, Ritu. 

Author's Response:

Awww...*hugs back*

Oh, that sounds like too much hard work - fancy having to meet all those deadlines and face the wrath of all those disgruntled fans....*shudders and hides under desk*...you wouldn't wish that on me, would you hun? *puppy eyes*

No, think I'll stay an amateur, it's much safer. 

Yep, Sam's having a bit of trouble re-adjusting at the moment. He's a bit like a child, not really understanding what's happening and why he isn't where he was before. But he's got good backup in Dean and Bobby, so....let's hope it's enough, eh?

Thanks hunny - everything is slowly returning to normal.

Jules

Reviewer: Oceane (Signed) · Date: 21/01/11 10:30 PM · On: Chapter 1

Jules, I so love your take of Sam getting is soul back. I so can see Sam confused, lost and scared after a whole year in the cage tortured by Lucifer and Michael, you described his state of mind so well. Even if the bond between the brothers has been severed for a long time now, Dean's patience and his gentleness toward his brother has been rewarded by Sam reaching for Dean. I enjoyed  Sam, Dean and Bobby POV, it was a powerful, heartwrenching and poignant read.  This first part left me out of breath literally, can't wait for the second one. Love Chris banner it fits so well with the story.

Jules, Sorry to hear that flooding hit your town Jules, I'm glad that things are getting better.

 

Author's Response:

Hullo, hun!

I am really thrilled that you love this so much. And relieved that I actually came up with an idea for you - lol. Thanks for giving me the prompt, and the challenge to find something a little different to the other tags. Hope I succeeded there. 

And yes, I think Sam's mind would have trouble making the leap from where his soul had been to where he is now, so there's bound to be massive confusion, especially if all the other memories were locked behind the wall as well. It's like he's had that whole year and a half removed. 

And of course, Dean's leapt straight back into big brother mode with his shattered sibling, cradling and protecting Sam until he can fend for himself. 

Thanks for that - Chris did an awesome job, didn't she? It so fit the story. 

Thank you, hun. The city is getting back on its feet, as are the surrounding towns. Lots of infrastructure still to be fixed, etc, but people have returned to homes and workplaces, the public transport is running apart from the ferries, and the massive cleanup is underway. 

hugs

Jules