Thanks for a wonderful story. I really loved it. I think you really hit the dynamics of Dean and Sam's relationship. I'm glad that Sam found out what happened between John and Dean all those years ago. Loved the ending where there seems to be some connection between the brothers. I really miss their closeness, especially with this season. Looking forward to reading more stories from you.

Author's Response:

Thank you for your kind responses! It's so encouraging knowing someone is liking it!

The last bit had me crying, too. I do believe Sammy has finally understood what John had to do and what it cost him. Sam is one that knows how to stand up for himself that is for sure. Dean is really shaken and hurt at what happened. I'm afraid he will suffer with doubt and bitterness for awhile. I'm glad that Bobby was there for Dean and was able to get through to him (I hope) that it isn't his fault that Sammy ran away, and that know one has the right to beat him like that. I'm really looking forward to the next part.

Gulp, I hope John can get YED out of Matt. Matt is probably dead, poor guy. I wonder how long John will be away from Dean? Dean is going crazy not knowing what happened to Sam. Sam was suppose to have been gone 2 weeks before Dean and John caught up to him, I wonder how many of those days did Dean have to deal with missing Sam by himself? I just keep remembering Dean's shudder when he told Sam that when John found out that he disappeared on his watch...The look Dean had, you know it was really bad. Hopefully, Sammy did hook up with a nice person Looking forward to the next chapter.

Man, oh man, that was one intense read. I was afraid that John was going to lose it with Sam and I'm not sure Dean or Sam would have survived it. Evidently, John must have beaten Dean when he was a little boy while he was drunk. I hate to break it to John, but I do believe Dean remembers every beat down he received from John.

Sam is really troubled too, and he is having extremely hard time coming to grips with what happened. I don't see him forgiving John anytime soon.

That last part where Dean is trying to deafen the baby's cries is quite telling too on his mental health.

John seems really detached from his sons and what is going on with them. There was a little glimmer of hope though; John realizing his sons need therapy.I'm really looking forward to reading the next chapter.

Author's Response: Thank you! It should be up soon!

I feel more badly for Dean here than the other two Winchesters. He is trying to shoulder both his brother's depression/trauma and John's spiraling out of control with drink. I don't know how much Dean can shoulder before he crumbles like his brother and father. He already seems like he is at his wit's end.

 Sam's creepy dream from Devil's Trap was something else. He doesn't really know what is going on exactly but he knows it is bad and he is likely the center of it. Poor Kid.

I'm am really irritated with John. He is the grownup here (Dean might be almost an adult but he really is just a teenager himself with way too much on his shoulders, thanks to John). He is the one that needs to help both his children instead of running away and letting Dean and Sam handle this terrible tragedy on their own. He just assumes that Dean can handle Sam. I just can't believe he actually thinks Sam is a burden, what is  he thinking? John is acting very cowardly IMO.

I've just got caught up reading the last 7 chapters and have really enjoyed the story. I'm really looking forward to reading more and finding out what the fallout will be for both boys when Sam finally runs away to Flagstaff. Seems like Dean felt that time was pretty bad especially when John realized what happened on Dean's watch. Looking forward to reading your interpretation. 

Author's Response:

Well spotted! Yup the dream in  ch:6 was from Devil's trap. Ch:5 from "Heart" This one is from "No rest for the wicked."