Reviewer: impalamedean1 (Signed) · Date: 04/01/10 02:48 PM · On: Chapter 8 - The Thing that Should Not Be, by Janger
this was just beautiful Jane, well done. Jess
Author's Response: Hi Jess, Thanks for dropping by and leaving the review and the sparkly stars, I'm pleased you enjoyed it, hun. Jane x
Reviewer: PADavis (Signed) · Date: 04/01/10 09:24 AM · On: Chapter 8 - The Thing that Should Not Be, by Janger
So glad we got them out of the blasted cave - only to of course, well, we all know what we did. LOL. Great description of the climb out and the monster lurking around in the fetid water. Phoebe
Author's Response: Thanks Phoebe, it felt so good to finally get them out into the light...we'll just have to see where they go from here!! Well, we wont but the others will!! heehee Jane x
Reviewer: PADavis (Signed) · Date: 04/01/10 09:12 AM · On: Chapter 7 - Up The Rabbit Hole, by RoweenaC
The description of the bone pile was absolutly chilling, the climb up disgusting and exhausting in so many ways. Well done. Phoebe
Author's Response: Phoebes, hey! Thx for the review! Glad you kinda liked... the chappie. chilling, exhausting and disgusting can only be compliments in this context, right? LOL. cheers, Ilka
Reviewer: PADavis (Signed) · Date: 04/01/10 08:20 AM · On: Chapter 6 - He Ain't Heavy, Irismay42
What a great chapter - and a wonderful cliffhanger. The dream sequence and recovery were chilling and sweet - nice way to play on our emotions there, Sharron. And we have sea water again, and a sea monster! Yay! Phoebe
Author's Response: Thanks Phoebe! You know I'm all about the emotional torture! Sharron
Reviewer: PADavis (Signed) · Date: 04/01/10 08:05 AM · On: Chapter 5 - Writing On The Wall, by BJXmas
What fun - I got behind over the holidays and now I get to play some catchup. And this was my first chapter. I love both brothers being smart and resouceful, so thank you, and well, injured of course, and I loved Sam hesitating because it might be an important archeological site. Phoebe
Author's Response: Thanks, Phoebe! I know how it goes, I am so far behind in my reading, so no worries. I always consider both boys are smart and resourceful, maybe just in different ways. And Sam, well, he is always trying to do the right thing...but thankfully warming Dean up was still more important than preserving the archeological site. I can't wait to get to your chapter, I hear you tied everything up really well, not an easy task! Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: Tree66 (Signed) · Date: 03/01/10 12:07 PM · On: Chapter 8 - The Thing that Should Not Be, by Janger
First, before I comment on the chapter- I wanna say how cool it is to see your name here Jane... I can remember meeting you, along with Bev and Louy - and soo many others at Asylum. At the time - you hadnt written any fanfic yet- and were so intimidated by it.... Now look at you!!! I can even remember the first time you posted on UnGen!!! LOL So seeing you here on this RR- kinda makes me feel a little like a proud parent... like I can say - I remember when! Anyway... This is just one more GREAT chapter. So very tense at the start- with Dean frantically yelling for Sam to get him out- the beastie circling- and then I think I jumped when it popped up out of the water at Sam... It all played out just like I was watching a movie! I was relatively relieved when the boys finally hit the daylight- although I knew nothing was EVER gonna be THAT easy for them... loved the perfect blend of wouded/dazed yet still concerned about Sammy -Dean that you gave us... And of course- lil brother that took charge and made sure his big brother was taken care of... This was just beautiful.... Pebbles, grit and dirt rained down upon the helpless brothers as they cowered into each other, Sam curling himself over the propped form of his brother, arms raised protectively against the stinging deluge. Dean’s hand snaked around and over the back of his baby brother’s exposed head, a near-futile gesture of defense. A fine example of how both are SOOO protective of each other... And then finally- the trip down the back of the mountain... filled with snark... “Dammit, Sammy…let’s not do that…again…anytime soon. No…” .... “Anytime…ever!” Now - I have to confess- I dont think I did so well in recognizing the films/series references.... - I mean- Terrorfish is a World of Warcraft reference.. but the only other thing I recognized was the Ebirah reference- cause that went to Godzilla - I think... so ummm... I guess I gotta read this a few more times... cause I missing something?? duh me!!! LOL - not that I mind rereading this a couple more times you see!!!!
Author's Response: Aawww, Thanks Mom! I keep reading this and grinning, it brought back all those incredibly happy memories from Asylum2. Meeting you, Bev, Lou, Alison and so many others was such a wonderful experience. It's true to say, without talking to you, Bev and Lou, I probably never would have taken the step to actually write my first ever fic! I'm so glad I did and writing this for you was an absloute pleasure not to mention a total blast writing with all the other (real) writers - I still feel like the new kid on the block!! Well, thank you for your lovely comments, Ilka left me with the boys floundering in the water at the top of the cavern and it was just so much fun to play with them. I knew I had to get them out and off the mountain or the others were going to lynch me, so moving a sore and very poorly Dean up and out and down was too tempting for words!! I only regret I didn't manage to get them under a tree and fix them up, although Toza did a beautiful job of that part of the tale... As for the film/show references, I guess I should put you out of your misery. Aquatraz, Phones and Terror Fish are all from 'Stingray' - I figured Dean would have caught re-runs of it as a kid and would have had a bit of a thing for AquaMarina (puppet based on Brigit Bardot). You got Godzilla and Ebirah and the Nightcrawler was from the XMen - a mutant with adhesive hands and feet (amongst other talents including a very long tongue!) - well they're the ones I remember... Anyway, thanks again for this wonderful site, Tree. I've not had a whole lot of time for writing this year as 2009 seemed determined to bite me n the ass at every opportunity so I'm hoping 2010 gives me more time to pursue this totally absorbing hobby. Thanks again hun, for that sharp nudge in the ribs to get me started. Jane x
Reviewer: irismay42 (Signed) · Date: 03/01/10 11:10 AM · On: Chapter 8 - The Thing that Should Not Be, by Janger
Jane, you write with a really poetic turn of phrase, and yet you're equally adept at the action sequences! I'm jealous! And the boys are finally free of the caves! Freeeeeee I tell you!!!
Author's Response: Hiya Sharon, Thank you for your very kind words and for the Americanisationing beta (haa, another long made up word lol). At least I didn't use any torches or vests (who would have known just how much fun you could have with a vest!!) lol Yep, they're out and ready to be mended for the next time!! :) Jane x
Reviewer: birdie (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:55 AM · On: Chapter 7 - Up The Rabbit Hole, by RoweenaC
Ewhhhh! Mound of stinking rotting flesh...maybe I need to take Dean for a nice warm shower? Heehee Bev x
Author's Response: Bev, tututut. I have taken him for a shower while I was writin it (more than once... cant keep my grabby fingers off him). And dude--- it was just yummy. You can however do the surture bit if you like... That nasty cut on his forehead turned the water pink. And you shouldn't be surprised of the decayin corpses, you know me ... Hugs, Ilka
Reviewer: birdie (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:51 AM · On: Chapter 6 - He Ain't Heavy, Irismay42
Stoned Dean...groovy man! Bev x
Reviewer: birdie (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:49 AM · On: Chapter 5 - Writing On The Wall, by BJXmas
I love stubborn, annoying, Dean and his refusal to get naked when theirs a battle to be won. And who can blame him for momentarily contemplating staring at Sammy's fine butt! Heehee nice Bev x
Author's Response: Hey, Bev! Yep, I love all the flavors of Dean, but stubborn and annoying are particular favorites. But somehow I don't think he got the same pleasure out of staring at Sam's fine butt as we would... LOL Later, B.J.
Reviewer: birdie (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:17 AM · On: Chapter 4 - Beating War Drums, by Birdy
Hey Kirst I love the whole yay - yei - yay...conversation. Slightly dopey DEan is so lovely and you clearly have an inate understanding of slight dopeyness! Heehee Bev xx
Author's Response: BEEEEEEV! I was gonna say I have no idea what you mean but that would sort of play into what you were insinuating. Grrr - damn you and your wiley ways! You must be part Trickster. Cheers for reviewing my lovely. Kirsty x
Reviewer: birdie (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:14 AM · On: Chapter 3 - Big Brothers Know Best, by LostatC
Kim. two words...gun porn! heeheeheehee! Bev xxx
Reviewer: birdie (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:13 AM · On: Chapter 2 - Mountains Washed Away, by Cookie6
Petra. Ahh ha...geek boy Sammy and banged up Dean...what more could a girl ask for? Lovely. Bev xx
Author's Response: Thank you, Bev. Considering you are UnGen's Queen of banged up Dean, I thank you very much with a big smile on my face.
Reviewer: birdie (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:09 AM · On: Chapter 1 - Up Snake Creek, by calUK
Cal I think its the darkness that's the scariest. Of course they'll try and laugh it off but its gonna be a rocky ride! bev xx
Reviewer: Primrose (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:08 AM · On: Chapter 8 - The Thing that Should Not Be, by Janger
Whew! At least they are out! I don't think either of them is in any shape to kill that thing, and I'm really worried about them! It's not a good sign that the monster has the strength to cause those tremors, either! You've got a great attention to detail- the wet guns are certainly going to have trouble firing! I think this story is very fun, and it's cool to see what each of you is able to contribute. You've all done such a good job!
Author's Response: Hiya Primrose, Thank you so much for the lovely review... You are right, they have both been through the wars and are in dire need of some TLC (volunteers anyone?) but at least they're out and safe for the time being. That was one of the fun things about taking part in this Round Robin, you didn[t know where you were going to pick them up and you didn't know where they were headed once you left them! A very different way to write a story but great fun to see how someone else dealt with it. I'm pleased you're enjoying the tale so far - there's plenty more ride still to come. Thanks again Jane x
Reviewer: birdie (Signed) · Date: 02/01/10 06:00 AM · On: Chapter 8 - The Thing that Should Not Be, by Janger
Hey Cap'n Yeah, you got our boys outta the damn cave! Wooha! And with a little help from Stingray and friends! Oh and in my book Ebirah always trumps Godzilla. "What’re you trying to tell me, Sam? The massive cave with the humongous pile of skeletal remains isn’t on the main tourist map? No shit Sherlock!”...Ah I love the subtle understated elegance of Dean's statements...heehee A lovely chapter. Well done my friend. Bev xx
Author's Response: Hiya Bev, Yeah, got em out at last!! It was kinda fun swimming round in that fetid pool with Dean, but everyone had threatened to lynch me if I didnt get them both out, ASAP, so out they are!! lol Yay, you got Stingray with Phones, Aquatraz and Terror Fish...I always figured Dean would have had a bit of a thing for AquaMarina! Big pile of virtual cookies heading your way! I'm so pleased you recognised the 'subtle understated elegance' of Dean's statements, he does have such a graceful turn of phrase...lol. Thanks so much for your lovely comments. Jane x
Reviewer: mizpah (Signed) · Date: 28/12/09 08:47 PM · On: Chapter 2 - Mountains Washed Away, by Cookie6
Dean grimaced. Sam was revving towards full blown geek-out. While Dean was continually amazed at his little brother's talent for uncovering the most obscure facts and information, it didn't mean he needed, nor wanted, the Encyclopedia Britannica version. Unchecked, Sam's brain would unleash every bit of research he had gleaned for this hunt in one fell, academic swoop. That paragraph made me chuckle - I love the mental image of Sam in full geek - ROFL. So we are getting a few more pieces of the puzzle now, like how they ended up in the cave - obviously they fell from somewhere, and the monster came after them. I'm glad to see that Sam's Weird how the water hasn't come into the cave the boys are sheltering in - is there something in teh cave, or something about the boys? Or is the Tichi-something just softening them up for later - giving them a sense of false security before it chows down on some Winchester burgers? I'd imagine they'd make very good eating, but I hope it doesn't eat them...... And I'm glad to see Sam is considering appeasing the native god-like creature rather than just killing it - repercussions and moral issues there about killing someone's native legend. Hmm, cup cakes? Are they like patty cakes? Is the chapter title from The Ocean by Led Zeppelin? Was I right? Can I have my patty cake now? Jules
Author's Response: Thank you for such a detailed review, Jules, I was thrilled to see you had visited our collaborative adventure. Your kind words make me blush with pleasure, as always. Your feedback is, as usual, cherished. Firstly, cupcake to you, name your flavour! Yes, Zeppelin's The Ocean it is, I dub you our first classic rock guru. Well done! It was important to me that we appease the Native God for all the reasons you mentioned, and I deliberately wanted to establish this very early in our story. All my co-authors agreed and ran with it beautifully, as the following chapters are wonderful testaments to. I love it that you agree. There's a reason the water didn't enter the cave, and my co-conspirators have this handled to perfection. Is there something in the cave? You'll have to keep reading to see! And yeah, we agree the boys would be yummy, however, my co-authors need them for the next 12 chapters so we'd better leave them without bites in them. Again, thanks heaps.
Reviewer: irismay42 (Signed) · Date: 28/12/09 05:01 PM · On: Chapter 7 - Up The Rabbit Hole, by RoweenaC
Only the Winchesters could make climbing a mountain of putrefying human remains this attractive!! Oh and congrats on getting the boys that little bit closer to getting out of those interminable caves!
Author's Response: Thanks hunny, really appreciate you takin time to review me! Hugs ya for it. Weird how the bit of gore - a mere third of the chappie- overshadows all the other sections... guess it was the best part then, LOL. Hugs, Ilka
Reviewer: Janger (Signed) · Date: 28/12/09 04:48 PM · On: Chapter 7 - Up The Rabbit Hole, by RoweenaC
Hiya Ilka, It was so good to go back and revisit this deliciously gruesome, grisly chapter! I had great fun climbing that huge mountain of gore with the boys and gagging alongside them. You painted a lovely vivid picture of that human mountain and interspersed some splendid Winchester angst and humour in their torturous climb to the top. So Ticholtsodl has decided to put in an appearance at last...I felt a shiver of horror knowing he was swimming around those beautifully bowed but grievously wounded, unprotected legs/ankles!! You left them so close to a way out of those damned caves but in such a precarious situation...such a lovely place to pick the story up!! Great chapter, immense fun with plenty of Hurt!Dean and caring/protective Sammy. Loved it, hun and can't wait to see you in Feb!! Jane x
Author's Response: Jane! Dude, I can't wait to read your chappie again. Loved it. Thanks for picking up where I left em. I know it was supposed to be different but you did a great job after all! And, seriously, those legs... soakin wet, hurt and swollen and all the usual Dean yumminess... man, I was drooling even though they were swimming in such a terrible human remains soup--- heehe. Thanks for reviewing hun. I appreciate it! And those stars are always welcome. Hugs ya and see you in Feb. I am counting the minutes hun! Ilka
Reviewer: Janger (Signed) · Date: 28/12/09 10:47 AM · On: Chapter 6 - He Ain't Heavy, Irismay42
Those poor Winchester boys, they didn't even get to enjoy their 'trip'. That was one awful peyote induced adventure you put them through, making them both witness each others death...I love the way you left us gasping for breath until relenting and waking them up, you could really feel the pain of their loss. Sam's understated words told a complete story in themselves. Heartbreaking... And so you've set the scene for the next stage in the adventure, that huge pile of gory bodies gave us such scope to play with! Then you've left us with the threat of the return of Ticholtsodi (I still have to check to spell that right!). Off to read the next one!! Jane x
Author's Response: Well, some people like to breaks the boys' bodies, I just like to shatter them emotionally! Oh and throw in a mound of human remains just to keep them on their toes! Iris
Reviewer: Primrose (Signed) · Date: 27/12/09 11:12 PM · On: Chapter 7 - Up The Rabbit Hole, by RoweenaC
Ewww! Squished eyeballs and rotting flesh is ICKY! :) Okay, I'm back from vacation, and I'm getting caught up on your wonderful chapter! It is SO TENSE! The water creeping up, and the pile of bones, and trying to tread water until the water level gets high enough, and the big monster coming up from underneath them, and...AHH! Very tense! And very cool! I love Sam getting irritated with Dean, then immediately feeling bad about it. His determination to find a way to get them out of there is wonderful. Poor Dean is still able to hang on through everything he's been through, the poor guy. I'm worried that he can't feel his foot at all- that can't be a good sign. All in all a fabulous job, hon! You've left the author following you in a sticky spot, but I think that's the fun of the round robin storytelling :) I can't wait to see the next chapter!
Author's Response: Heeheeee, you know I love gore! You shoulda seen that one coming hun! Glad you liked it. Really. Thanks for reviewing. And rest assured, Jane is up next and she'll take care of Dean and his many, many injuries... Doesn't mean he is safe from future harm now, does it? *looks at list of writers that follow her chapter* Nope, deffo more hurt coming your way. And I had a few conversations with Jane before I left them at that point. I was sposed to get em out but the immense amount of words and the ridiculous length of the chapter called me back into reality. So I left it to her to take em out... Glad you liked Sam there. I just love it if he gets irritated. That bitchface is just priceless. And then the guilt right after it. I just NEEDED to do that. It's a classic. Thanks again for this, loves ya! Ilka
Reviewer: Oceane (Signed) · Date: 27/12/09 12:49 PM · On: Chapter 7 - Up The Rabbit Hole, by RoweenaC
What a gripping and riveting chapter. So well written I was there with them climbing that pile of bones and I swear I smell the decomposition of the corpses. They're not out of danger, can't wait for the next installment to know what's going to happen to them.
Author's Response: Aw, thanks my dear. And those pretty stars are wonderful to look at! Climbing that dung heap was a very ambiguous pleasure, wasn't it? At least I felt so when I wrote it. OH, the next chappie will be awesome, you just wait! Thanks again for takin the time! See ya around! Ilka
Reviewer: Janger (Signed) · Date: 27/12/09 04:46 AM · On: Chapter 5 - Writing On The Wall, by BJXmas
Hiya BJ, What a wonderful slice of Hurt/Comfort to help me recover from my Christmas excesses!! I love the way you stepped back from the action and gave the boys time to assess their situation. Dean was simply infuriating in his refusal to take his clothes off, I was with Sammy there, (purely for medicinal purposes - you understand!) but his reasoning was so perfectly stubborn Dean. Your characterisation of both of them and their underlying emotions was dead on target. Dean playing down his injuries, maintaining maximum iritate Sam mode and being delightfully obtuse. Sam in mother hen mode, given a chance to pay his brother some much needed attention, then thwarted by his obstinance. The gentle, snarking humour attempting to mask the very real hurt and danger that they are now in, was delightful. I loved the discovery of the stack of firewood - probably my favourite line... "When you were yammering away with Tony. You know, doing your whole yappy dog protector thing...standing between me and Mr. Big-time Navajo God. It was either stare at your butt or check out our little slice of heaven." had me giggling away to myself. I adore where you left them, both well on their way to stoner heaven, such a lovely gateway to the next chapter. Loved it. Jane x
Author's Response: Hey, Jane! Yep, I figure all the readers were hoping for some naked Dean, sorry to disappoint. Like Kripke, I took a little perverse pleasure in teasing it and not delivering. But it sure was fun letting Dean get all snarky, and as a hunter we all know the job comes first and unfortunately you can't hunt with your pants down. Glad you liked the Tony yammering line. It is always fun to cut loose and let Dean's attitude and smart mouth out. He does have a way about him, most especially when they are in danger. Lots of angst in their situation. Thanks for the lovely comments. Later, B.J.
Reviewer: Janger (Signed) · Date: 27/12/09 04:20 AM · On: Chapter 4 - Beating War Drums, by Birdy
Hey Kirsty, I've just had a chance to sit down and read this once more, and it's had me giggling all over again... The 'Yei, Yay' exchange has me chuckling every time I read it and the addition of the Space Coyote was just so Dean. It was such spot on humour and so typical of the boys in backed into a tight corner. Slighty exasperated and desperate Sammy was perfect - trying to extract answers and help from the evasive and very cryptic Tony... I love the way you managed to impart so much information on the background of the story whilst maintaining such entertaining dialogue. Your Hurt!Dean was wonderful, you really managed to convey what a wretched condition he was in, struggling back to the surface of consciousness and all its horrors to be with Sam. Sam's tender protectiveness and concern summed up their relationship perfectly. All in all, I love where you took us with this chapter, it was a real pleasure to read. Hope you and yours had a lovely Christmas, Bev forgot to post off our joint pressie for Jamie, so hopefully there'll be a little something in the post in the New year. Jane x
Author's Response: Ahh, it doesn't take much to set you giggling though, eh Jane? Was there cider involved too? The Hurt!Dean was actually suggested by Cal as my original chapter was a bit too upbeat given that they were stuck in a cave. I'm not an angst writer as a rule so Chipper!Angst was born. Glad you liked it. Jamie is looking forward to yet more spoiling from his Supernatural Aunties. I've been debating buying him a leather jacket and toy Impala. Whaddya reckon? Too much? Happy New Year, m'dear. Kirsty x
Reviewer: bjxmas (Signed) · Date: 26/12/09 11:03 PM · On: Chapter 6 - He Ain't Heavy, Irismay42
I feel like a quaterback who threw a pass and watched his wide-receiver run the length of the field to make a touchdown. Way to go, Sharron! I love how you handled the Winchesters' Magical Mystery Tour. I've read this chapter several times now and I still get a thrill. The reader totally buys that the dream is real until it suddenly isn't. Great job with that. And I love all the voices whispering, Help us. And how eerie scary is it when they find a mound of skulls and bones? You opened the story right up and I can't wait to see where the other writers take it. And while we've witnessed Dean's agony of losing Sammy on the show, you matched it with your version. And the quiet way you left Sam's version of the dream to speculation makes it resonate for Sam too. Just the small comments and the looks away tell the tale, Sam endured the same anguish as Dean. Oh, these poor, poor boys. What a treat that our chapters ended up back to back. And you took the story places I'd never imagined. I hope you had a great holiday. I finally got a borrowed laptop and intermintent internet service. That's halfway there. Later, B.J.
Author's Response: Yay for the borrowed laptop! Well you really did give me a lot to work with in your chapter - Stoned!Dean in particular! I'm glad it wasn't obvious from the start that Dean was dreaming, even when he found Sam dead. I probably would have put in an explanation of what Sam dreamed about if I'd had a longer word limit, but as it stands, I think it actually works better leaving it to the readers' imagination. I definitely think Sam's dream would have been along a similar line to Dean's. Glad you managed to get the chance to read it and comment! Sharron
|
