Reviewer: mymuseandi (Signed) · Date: 29/12/07 06:45 AM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
I like this story.....The breakdown scene is entirely believable.....and yup i often wondered why he didn't break down earlier and a little more often...all the pent up frustration will kill him... Happy New Year!!
Author's Response: Thanks, glad you liked it. Yeah, my friend Swan is a counselor with a masters in psychology and she always guides me on the technical stuff, how he "should" break down, 'cause Lord knows all the Winchesters certainly have enough of a reason to lose it. You have a Happy New Year and happy reading! B.J.
Reviewer: garvaldmains (Signed) · Date: 03/12/07 03:28 AM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
Amazing Stuff, so well written and so heartfelt. Really choked. Havent started watching season 3 yet - UK sucks - but think JA could handle this scene really well as DW heads towards the last year - something has to snap since the deal ... Very clever LOL Dix
Author's Response: Thanks, Dix. JA is an inspiration. He is so good at portraying the emotional pain of Dean and drawing us in. It is terrible that you are so behind on the seasons, sometimes we forget here in the states that there are so many viewers that haven't started S3 yet. I can't wait for that emotional scene when Dean reveals to Sam or Bobby that he is scared. He will blow us away, I'm sure. Thanks again for reviewing. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: Janger (Signed) · Date: 04/09/07 05:23 PM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
Heartbreaking yet unltimately uplifting, a wonderful piece of emotive writing. I have just spent the last 2 hours crying my way through the four chapters. This worked on every level, the setting, with Ellen providing the safe haven where Dean can at last release his inner torment, the gradual build up and total breakdown and finally the healing and forgiveness. I loved the fact that Dean had the chance to speak with John, (something anyone who has ever lost anyone would give their right arm for) to deal with all the anguish of his past and present and to find at the end that Sam had the chance not just to witness it but to experience it all too. Just so good! Thank you for all the time and effort you have spent on this, I can't wait to read some of your others. Jane
Author's Response: Thank you, Jane, for such an impressive review. I did spend a lot of time on this story. It actually scared me to death, just wanting to do it justice. I am immensely happy you liked it and felt I succeeded. Swan and I just felt Dean needed this and the show with its limited timeframe simply wasn't able to delve this deeply into Dean's pain and catharsis. I did think the look John gave both his boys at the end of AHBL2 was a beautiful condensed version of my meeting between them. The emotion was definitely there. I hope you enjoy some of my other stories as much as I enjoy writing them. These Winchesters and particularly Dean are such deep and intriguing characters and I love exploring their psyches. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: rebecca (Signed) · Date: 02/05/07 11:17 PM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
men?! damn! i cried like a baby. super!!!! good job!!!! i love dean!!!!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! We all love Dean, what an amazing character. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: whitewave (Signed) · Date: 29/04/07 08:30 AM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
BJ, the work you put into this story called to me to respond by rereading it all and commenting on each chapter. You did such a great job and I loved the way you brought Sam into it in this chapter. Your use of legacy in the watch, but more importantly in their fight against evil passed on by their Dad was perfect. You verbalized a vision that has always drawn me to their story. I look forward to reading your future stories. Jenny
Author's Response: Jenny, your reviews on this story made me feel soooo good! I love that I was able to touch you with my story. These Winchesters, particularly Dean, touch me and inspire me to write these stories. As you stated, their story is so inspiring, and beautifully and heartbreakingly presented to us every week. Fanfics allow us the opportunity to delve deeper into their hearts and background and try to figure them out. I love that! I indulged myself with the John and Dean moments in the third chapter and I loved that I could then have the Sam and Dean moments in this chapter. Sam also needed Dad back and I was happy to have him experience the meeting between his brother and Dad so he too could find peace. I also loved letting him understand his brother better by feeling his pain. Sometime in the future I plan on expanding on this story with a sequel. I know the brothers still have issues to talk about and I hope to also bring Bobby in to see his reaction to the new, open Dean. For now I am taking a break cause this story drained me, and I am so looking forward to the final three episodes this season. Again, thank you so much for reading and taking the time to express your thoughts. Writers live for reviews and knowing that our stories have meaning. Thank you and take care, B.J.
Reviewer: whitewave (Signed) · Date: 29/04/07 07:52 AM · On: Chapter 3 - Destiny
Wow! Using the image of an earthquake to express all that pain until his geode split in two was perfect. I loved that you sent John to free him to feel all his pain, his anger and loss. It was perfect and you dealt with all the mistakes John had made by having him explain and give Dean love and hope. Definitely did a fabulous job at expressing what you started out to do -- a real catharsis.
Author's Response: Again, thank you. This was the tough chapter. I wrote the first two and kept procrastinating on this one, cause it was just so daunting. Without Swan's gentle urging, I might still be hesitating. Once I committed to writing it, it was heartbreaking to write and I know it was painful to read. I truly worried that readers wouldn't understand or "forgive" Dean for actually crying and venting all his pent-up emotions. So many like the stoic, tough Dean, but the man is human which is what I love about him. To survive what he has been thru makes him the strongest man I've ever seen. And of course, John had to come back and talk with Dean. Dean deserved that and there were so many issues unresolved. And the whole point was to make Dean stronger. To let him be that whole man and to give him the love and hope he deserves. I love that you "got" all the points I was trying to make. Thank you again, B.J.
Reviewer: whitewave (Signed) · Date: 29/04/07 06:27 AM · On: Chapter 2 - Discovery
This chapter was so powerful it was almost overwhelming. I loved the image of Dean as a geode. And your use of his forcing the pain down into an empty nothing. Also the description of all is pain as a mountain of rocks and boulders. Just wanted you to know that you couldn't have done better as expressing all that pain from his entire life.
Author's Response: I am very happy with how this chapter turned out. I do think the geode metaphor fits Dean perfectly and I am just glad that I could explain it sufficiently that most everyone agreed. That is very gratifying. Swan again helped me expand on that idea with the contined references to rocks and volcanos, etc. Not having any writing training, I originally didn't use the comparison as much. She loved it so and said I needed to use it more. She was absolutely right and thank goodness she was there to help.
Reviewer: whitewave (Signed) · Date: 29/04/07 04:22 AM · On: Chapter 1 - Memories
I loved this story so much that I am going back and reading it again so I can tell you what I loved chapter by chapter. That is a first for me :). You did such a wonderful job at showing how Dean's pain goes so much farther back than his Dad's death and introducing the watch in such a powerful way -- great job!
Author's Response: Thank you. I am so touched by your review. Time is our most precious commodity, so to think you would spend time reading my story again means so much! I am glad the childhood scenes worked so well. I love writing Wee! chester stories cause I do think the secret to Dean is in his childhood. Swan and I are always saying that part of Dean is still that child trapped in his tragic past. Whenever he gets emotional and cries you can see the scared little boy who never got over that trauma. So heartbreaking!
Reviewer: ciel4 (Signed) · Date: 28/04/07 03:08 AM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
Really enjoyed the story BJ, it was powerful and moving. Thank you for all the hard work that went into it!
Author's Response: Thank you for reading and reviewing. The response on this story has made all the hard work totally worth it. I am so glad I attempted this story. I just hope Dean gets some release on the show and Jensen shows us those emotions. Later, B.J.
Reviewer: fredo (Signed) · Date: 27/04/07 01:50 PM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
wow, that was a great story ! The psychological approach was very well done and the supernatural touch with John was amazing. It's to slow and actionless for the show, but we have you, so thanks !
Author's Response: Thanks! That is the beauty of fanfics that we can dig deeper into their psyches and expand on the show's strong characters. We can also take the characters further down the road then the show may be willing to let them go. The realistic psychological aspects are all due to Swan and her knowledge and ability to finally get me to understand all the subtle manners in which it would all come about. Thanks Swan! So glad you enjoyed my story. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: clclemmons (Signed) · Date: 27/04/07 01:48 PM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
Another beautiful story, this is why these boys just touch our hearts in so many ways.
Author's Response: Thank you! All the Wincesters are so amazing and then when you have them interacting together, especially revealing their true emotions. Wow! I just love this show and I love watching the three J's bring these characters to life. Here's hoping the final three episodes gives us some of their emotional bonding in addition to the angst. Later, B.J.
Reviewer: lam (Signed) · Date: 27/04/07 01:37 PM · On: Chapter 4 - Brothers United
All of your hard work on this story is totally obvious. You have produced a very fine piece of writing. I was a little nervous of Dean's breakdown at first, but you captured it perfectly. Yes, he needed to acknowledge his pain to be able to move past it, but as he says himself (or you say for him), he's not going to end up on an analyst's couch. Dean really is the iron man you portray - not many people would have his strength of character but that's what makes him Dean. I think, as well, that you have captured many of the themes explored this season on the show. Dean's realization that Sam is an adult and that Dean can't always be the one to save Sammy - Sam can and needs to save both himself and Dean at times. I think the final episodes of this season are going to provide you with your wish in regards to JA's acting. Thank you for all of your hard work and this beautiful story.
Author's Response: Thank you for such a wonderful, touching review. Whew! I am so glad you think I accomplished what I was hoping to. This was so scary to write because I do see Dean as strong and resilient and I certainly didn't want to present him as weak in any way. But damn, with all he has been thru the man needed to release some of that pain. I do think Sam has come into his own this season and together they are finding their strength. I do so hope the final three episodes give us some of JA amazing, emotional acting. Of course, I'm not sure I can handle it, but it will be spectacular. Thanks again for all the wonderful support on this story. As hard as it was to write, it was totally worth it. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: fredo (Signed) · Date: 27/04/07 10:22 AM · On: Chapter 3 - Destiny
wow, i'm barely breathing, what an emotional chapter. Poor Dean needs to hear all these words since so long... Well, probably better late than never...
Author's Response: I loved that John finally told Dean he was proud of him in IMTOD, but I always hated that John died and they never got the opportunity to further connect and talk. In discussing how and why Dean would finally release his pain, Swan explained that he needed a safe place to finally cry and let it all out. John would be the one he would feel comfortable breaking down with. That also gave them the chance to finally say all the things that weren't said prior to John dying. Dean did need to hear those words from John. So glad you felt I captured that moment. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: ciel4 (Signed) · Date: 27/04/07 06:50 AM · On: Chapter 3 - Destiny
Very powerful stuff, poor poor Dean. He may never get this sort of release in the show, but he sure deserves something. You have described the price of his self-sacrifice so well.... looking forward to the next chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you. Yes, this was the hardest chapter to write. I just hope the show gives him some sort of release. After all he has given up for his family and the hunt, he deserves it. Later, B.J.
Reviewer: IMTheresa (Signed) · Date: 24/04/07 11:23 PM · On: Chapter 3 - Destiny
I'm so glad I found this story and I can't wait for the last chapter. I love the geode metaphor; the watch and the amulet; John's loving and comforting words to Dean. It's all so beautiful! Thank you for sharing this with us!
Author's Response: Thank you for the wonderful review! We all know Dean needs to release his pain and I just hope the show gives him a scene like this. I love seeing Dean and John together and they have so many issues that need to be resolved. Can't wait for JDM to return in the finale. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: lam (Signed) · Date: 24/04/07 06:14 PM · On: Chapter 3 - Destiny
Wow. This is a piece of writing that you should be very proud of. You capture the nuances of grief and loss so well. I suspect that we may see a scene very similar to this (Dean finally unable to contain his pain) coming up in the show very soon...
Author's Response: Swan and I are hoping the show lets Dean release some of his pain soon. I don't read the spoilers, but it sounded like maybe something might be happening by the end of the season. That was one of the main reasons I decided to post this story instead of sending it into the zine. Thank you for all your kind reviews and support. This is a story I did spend time on, trying to make it as perfect as I could. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: kwater (Signed) · Date: 24/04/07 12:26 AM · On: Chapter 2 - Discovery
Excellent job, I'm wiping away the tears. - Thanks for the read - K
Author's Response: You're welcome. Imagining Jensen playing this scene as Dean is enough to make me cry. That man sure knows how to show Dean's pain and emotions. Thanks for the kind words, B.J.
Reviewer: ReccaF (Signed) · Date: 23/04/07 12:37 PM · On: Chapter 2 - Discovery
I was totally engulfed by this story. The emotions fightning with each other, seeing a side of the Winchesters that would normally not be revealed. I wait with great expectation for the other chapters.You have captured the essence of the brothers and their on/off relationship with one another. It's almost too painful to visualize Dean's suffering with his burden-knowing that it is the glue that keeps him together. Without Sam, Dean has no structure -no life. each brother being a part of the entire picture.One reallly understands that Dean would indeed die if Sam were gone.I can only wait for the next installment with anxious attention.
Author's Response: Thank you for such a lovely review. I love exploring the motivations and reactions of all the Winchesters. The brotherly dynamic is just so fascinating. As much as they all love each other, none of them are perfect and there is always more going on below the surface. I am so pleased you think I realistically capture them. Thanks again, B.J.
Reviewer: fredo (Signed) · Date: 22/04/07 06:00 AM · On: Chapter 2 - Discovery
hey, just had a quiet morning (a swing in a sunny day can entertain a five year old girl during hours!), so i just went through your story, and it's great. I always wonder how Dean's holding things together with all that pressure. So a breakdown was predictable. But Dean being Dean, he won't allow himself to be weak too long right, but is he gonna be allright by himself or will he for once accepting help... I can't wait to know. I will be right here at your next update, and for now i'm gonna do my civic duty because today here in France we elect our new president. See you.
Author's Response: Oh, a swing on a sunny day sounds so peaceful and relaxing. Don't you wish Dean had more pleasant days like that? Everyone can thank Swan for wanting Dean to get that emotional release. As a therapist she knows first hand that he cannot keep going with all this stuff being piled on him without some kind of breakdown. I do hope the show gives him a release. Next chapter will start answering your questions. Thank you for the wonderful review. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: ciel4 (Signed) · Date: 22/04/07 01:57 AM · On: Chapter 2 - Discovery
I LOVE the comparison of Dean to geodes. I know absolutely nothing about them, but if what you wrote is true (and even if it isn't!) it's a wonderful analogy. You are doing a beautiful job describing Dean's emotions as well - someone needs to give that boy a hug RIGHT NOW! Great work, thank you.
Author's Response: Oh Thank You! I know about geodes cause my dad was into rocks, made us some very nice bookends out of geodes. I did worry that if you weren't familiar with them then you might not understand the analogy. Sounds like I described it well enough to make sense. Even I had to do some research on how they are formed and yes, it is intense pressures of nature that form them. Dean just seemed to fit perfectly with them in all aspects, especially all the beauty and wonders hidden beneath the tough exterior rock. I love that man! Thanks for the lovely review, B.J.
Reviewer: lam (Signed) · Date: 21/04/07 09:31 PM · On: Chapter 2 - Discovery
Wow! What a truly magnificent chapter. I love your metaphor of the geode. Perfect. I have a feeling we may be seeing a scene like this coming up on an episode soon... Really, I just don't know what to say to do justice to this wonderful piece of writing...
Author's Response: Thank you, thank you. Originally I was writing this for a magazine, but I started thinking the season finale might have something similar so we thought it best to just go ahead and post it. The zines take so long to get into print. I do think the geode metaphor fits Dean perfectly. Thank goodness my dad was into rocks! Thanks again for all the kind praise. Take care, B.J.
Reviewer: Tree66 (Signed) · Date: 21/04/07 08:39 PM · On: Chapter 2 - Discovery
BJ - what a tearjerker! Like most- it crushes me to see a crushed Dean, but as sad as it is - you did him proud. Nice job!
Author's Response: Thanks, that means a lot. I always feel like I am walking a fine line, allowing Dean to be that vulnerable, scared, little four-year old boy, but still showing him as the strong survivor that he is. I hope I maintain the balance. Thanks again, B.J.
Reviewer: bayre (Signed) · Date: 20/04/07 09:39 PM · On: Chapter 1 - Memories
I haven't even finished Valentine, and now I go and start on another one...lol Great opening chapter! Laura
Author's Response: Thanks! I know I never have time to read most of the stories I'd like to read. At least this is only a four chapter story. Later, B.J.
Reviewer: lam (Signed) · Date: 19/04/07 06:57 PM · On: Chapter 1 - Memories
What a powerful story. You are doing a beautiful job capturing the boys and John. Eagerly looking forward to the next chapter.
Author's Response: Oh Thank You! I love writing the boys preseries and I love John. There is just so much background on these Winchesters that helps explain how they are the way they are. I love exploring that. Later, B.J.
Reviewer: ciel4 (Signed) · Date: 19/04/07 06:35 PM · On: Chapter 1 - Memories
What a wonderful first chapter, it was really worth all the agonising you did over it! I loved the flashbacks, and the idea that there would be some small family connection for Dean and Sam. John better not have pawned that watch! And where is Sam on Dean's 21st birthday? Can't wait for the next update!
Author's Response: This was one of those stories I was scared to write. Didn't trust that I could do it justice. Swan was instrumental in getting me to take the risk. Sam was there, just not around for the John and Dean scene. And of course, Sam had no idea what Dean was hoping for. You know these Winchesters, don't discuss it if you can avoid it. Thanks, B.J.
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