Reviewer: penmin(Signed) · Date: 21/01/09 06:38 AM · On: Chapter 1
You do have the basis of a good story, you wanted an honest review, the lay out was a little out of sorts, and on occaision I wasnt sure which character was speaking, but hey that could have been me reading too fast. lol
generally its a very good first story. Every one we do, we learn by and we all have to start somewhere. Ive done a few and I'm still learning!