Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 16/11/09 06:10 PM · On: I swallow. I gag. I adapt.
As far as I know, no one has dared to write about Dean being the torturer. This was an exquisite piece, full of sadness, and the slow, agonizing death of Dean's humanity. Although Dean was free from physical torture, he was still subjected to a great torment---a greater torment as the torturer than as the obvious victim. "The brain representing the person, their past, their memories, their dreams and fears." This perspective is one that I wouldn't have reached on my own. Very astute!
Author's Response: Hey Shannon. Wow. I had nearly forgotten I wrote that. I hadda go back and read it before replyin. Well, if you say so (being a devoted reviewer around here) I believe it. I always felt that this torturer!Dean a widely spread theme. Tho I can't think of another story on this topic on UnGen, now that you mention it... I must say the thought of Dean in hell as a torturer has never left me completely. Not even after writing this or On A Head Of A Pin. I still dwell on it and maybe one day I will write another one. I think torturing was way worse for Dean than suffering through the agonizing treatment himself. It just goes against everything he learned, worked, hoped and aspired. That in mind, I left out the bloody mess of torturing him and went straight to his time as a torturer. I think at that point he was just on the edge and seeing a corpse/victim so reminiscent of Sam might have just pushed him over. Not the fact that it might have been Sam but the realisation that it wasn't him... Thx for takin the time again Shannon. I see you're working through my oneshots now? That's just awesome! Cheers, Ilka
Reviewer: Midge (Signed) · Date: 23/05/09 03:38 PM · On: I swallow. I gag. I adapt.
I found that sad rather than gory or revolting. Somehow my brain can't process that this is Dean and I think I'm happy about that. It was poynant that Dean thought one body may be Sam and that it made him sort of happy that he was in hell with him. Though I'm sure if it really had been Sam, Dean would have been fighting Alaistair not torturing for him.
Author's Response: Fair point, Midge, about Dean unwilling to torture Sam. I sure would hope so. Actually, it might have been the one thing that would have kept him fighting against Alastair instead of giving in. However I still think Dean's stay hell has been far worse than any of us could ever imagine. I mean, he broke. That hero of a guy broke after 30 years! Holy crap. Mind you this ficlet was written at a time when Dean appeared to be so weak and it kinda rubbed off on how I perceived him... Anyway, glad you like it... somehow. And thanks for the review and the stars. See you at Asylum! Ilka
Reviewer: 0kieD0kie (Signed) · Date: 05/01/09 10:47 PM · On: I swallow. I gag. I adapt.
Oh, this was definitely gory, but I don't hate you! You wrote it very well! Poor Dean! I would not want to be the one being tortured! Ouch!
Author's Response: Heh. Gore is a sick pleasure to write. Although putting Dean through that ordeal cost me dearly. I have to say I had to stop from time to time to get rid of the lump in throat. Thanks for your comment and those lovely stars aswell. Cheers, Ilka
Reviewer: mustang (Signed) · Date: 05/01/09 06:41 PM · On: I swallow. I gag. I adapt.
wow, what a heavy story..Beautifully written..I love the banner for this story..Thanks for writing.
Author's Response: Hey ya mustang... Heavy, gory, angsty, what's left to wish for, huh? Ta for reviewing and I am glad it worked for you. The banner was first and the story sorta sprung from it. And from the lovely promo used in the banner.... gives me goosebumps in a very weirdly pleasant way. Thanks for the stars, Ilka
Reviewer: darkhunter (Signed) · Date: 05/01/09 12:35 PM · On: I swallow. I gag. I adapt.
A very dark disturbing story, but a great read, love the banner.
Author's Response: Hey Lindsay. Glad you liked it! "dark and disturbing" seems to be the mood of the week. Have another story in preparation that goes even further... Ta for the compliment on the banner. I had it done even before the story was written! Isn't he just breathtakingly gorgeous in a gory, menacing and psychopathic way? Hugs, Ilka
Reviewer: copycat666 (Signed) · Date: 05/01/09 12:09 PM · On: I swallow. I gag. I adapt.
I surtenly don't hate you for this one , it's great and the words you've chosen are very hell like and yet so sad ! Great job , I loved it to death !
Author's Response: Hey ya! Loved it to death, have ya? So you gonna read my next project then too? It is going to be a death fic? Maybe you'll hate me then! Hehe. It is my life's ambition to traumatize and be hated. No, just kidding. Not about the death fic tho. Anyways, thanks for taking the time and especially for the stars to light my way from deepest hell into the light! Ilka
Reviewer: NongPradu (Signed) · Date: 05/01/09 11:42 AM · On: I swallow. I gag. I adapt.
Aha -- was that Castiel's hand searing a scar on our poor torturer? Sick and insightful. I think we all imagine Dean would be both revolted by and somehow insanely lost in the act of torturing other souls. Well done.
Author's Response: Hey NongPradu... Thanks for taking the time to review. And about the hand... what would you say? I think it was Cas... Sick, lost, revolted... not just Dean feeling that way, me too. Though it was a pleasure to inflict some pain have him live through the emotional trauma, it was at the same time very tough to write. I watched it happen with my mind's eye... not very nice... Take care. Ilka
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