wow. stunning writing. packed to the brim - and over! - with beautiful, awful imagery and written so vividly you can see every inch of it. a few fav lines - tho not all - there's not enough room!
She had led him out of the darkness, damning him all the way. - such a wonderful contrast - leading him to the light but at the same time turning straight back to the dark.
It was hard to see- he made it hard to see- the way Sam… waffled, really, like a big dog that didn’t want to seem so tall, - hee hee, just a touch of humour, and spot on. puppy dog eyes ain't just a saying!
It made him guilty to even think it, but he’d put Dean’s time of it against his own, and measure them inch for inch. he really did go through hell, didn't he? no wonder things have changed. and again, you hit it spot on - the guilt for feeling it but at the same time, knowing it to be true.
Like it was no big deal. The thought still ached, deep inside. Like Sam didn’t need him at all. - aw! poor guy. finding the iPod jack in the car, the bra in the bed... must've hurt. and you write it so simply - can see the tears buried deep down in his eyes.
a quiet yearning in his voice, - oh, how he must want to.
And then he was holding another dead girl in his arms- covered in her blood- a stranger... who looked like a demon he used to know once, but not quite. He sat there with her, alone on the killing floor next to the smoking gun, in silence, until his brother came and found him. It wasn’t long. - just love this last para. so lonely in the dark, just a hint of hope in Dean coming to find him quickly. the idea that he could be grieving for her is fantastic, brilliantly expressed in the ohrase, 'like a demon he used to know once' - it's kind of wistful and sad and guilty at the same time.
really fantastic read - would love to know what happens next, your style really suits one-shots but a sequel would be fantastic, dealing with the fallout, trying to get their lives back on track... *smiles hopefully...*
and yeah - love the dresden files and the Rob Thurman books! ;)
holy shit. er...
Thank you so much. lol. that last para especially, exactly what I was going for, glad I got that right.
The dog line is one of my personal faves as well, hee. Part of that's from RT's Cal, (also the 'fun' of being evil, wish SPN would get a darkling,lol.) I like the idea of Sam subconsciously knowing what he's capable of and striving away from that. Also, we have a dog, Max, who is the biggest Great Pyr we've ever had, and he does exactly that lol, cowardly lion, as it were.
I hadn't thought of a sequel... I don't know, I'll certainly think about it. I am working on other one-shots at the moment (I really do like the short story format), so there's that at least... But I'll keep it in mind.
But that is quite the review, I really appreciate it, thanks again!