Wow................oh, what? *looks around*..sorry, was still thinking about the shower scenes...:P..seriously though, they were very detailed, and left me with some very pretty graphic images..Hee, very nice story. :D

Um....yes chapter 4 should be a gratuitous shower scene..but seems as I'm a little late and chapter 4 is already made..*shrugs*..anyway, I love the part about Dean blowing his nose and then inspecting it, I could see that right on the show..and I love that you refer to Sam's dimples as weapons..cuz you know, they kinda are..we never saw them coming..*shakes head sadly*..we'll never be the same..:P

The obvious big "plus" regarding this chapter, is the cleanliness of our heroes.  Taking the time to personify the old saying, "Cleanliness is next to Godliness," the shower scenes are the heart and soul of the chapter.

But delving into the text a little deeper, the subtler, more refined aspects of the author's storytelling abilities come to light.  The phrasing, the pacing and the tone of very specific moments throughout the story, fulfill a standard of previously high expectations that her readers have come to expect.  These points in the storytelling art, are almost magical in their execution.  The words, phrases, and concepts used to describe the scenes are fresh, active, unique and perfect.  Only an author of her caliber can carry off a description of the challenge the two brothers find themselves facing, when they realize their needs are identical and cannot be taken care of at the same time.  This dilemma is both strongly and beautifully written in the following paragraph:

"For a brief moment all was calm and still as 'The First Shower Debate:  The Intrinsic Rights of The Oldest vs. The Extenuating Hair Care Needs of The Youngest" was silently waged through eye contact and brow movement."

The fight scene resulting from this challenge is a vivid rendering in words, of a true physical competition to attain their individual goals, and the imagery leaps off the page in real time, as the reader is pulled into the action as it unfolds.

So much in the way of the setting up of the scene, the delicate nuances of the brothers' reactions, and the resulting execution of their responses to that classic plot device of them both needing the same thing at the same time, carries that subtle tone of the western gunfighter standoff and shootout that resonates so well as a universal concept.

All this, and we haven't finished reading the first page.

How is it possible to pack so many detailed scenes in such a tightly woven chapter?  It is a testament to an extraordinary skill and a brilliant mind.

This is a gift, a rare gift, and we, the readers are blessed to have the opportunity to immerse ourselves in this exquisitely, fine-tuned world of delightful and unique people and the places they inhabit.  The story's tone is so "on-the-money," while the pacing has the perfect balance of detail and action and dialog.

This chapter stands alone as a classic and pure example of an author's unique and singular vision, and, irregardless of how many times it is read and reread, the theme, the plot and the overall execution hold up with repeated close examination.  In the end, they never grow dull, they never lose their luster.

After all, any author who can keep her readers with her, through an otherwise awkward scene in the end stages of a shower that is ending when the hero, "Sighing contentedly, his eyes drifted closed as one soap slicked hand ran across his firm stomach and...", has a true gift.  She has played her cards with flawless skill, allowing readers of all sensibilities, the opportunity to enjoy a moment that, in anyone else's less gifted hands, would have been denied to certain segments of some reader populations despite their interest in the story's moment.

This chapter has so many magical moments, starting with the title of the debate between the two brothers, and ending with the detailed dialog at the end of the chapter. 

It will always be memorable for more than the obviously delightful aspects of the shower scenes.  The creative energies infusing the descriptions throughout the story are so refined in their detail, they can only be described as "magnificent."

This is a timeless masterpiece.

A classic of the genre.

And naked guys, to boot!

Whoa!

Kate

Author's Response:

Wow Kate, when you promise something you really deliver, don’t you? Have your family seen you at all the past couple of days? I am quite overwhelmed but, still, no Latin quotes...

Don’t really know how to respond to this. "Thanks!" seems a bit inadequate to say the least. When there are so many fantastic authors, proper writers who have stories with plots and research and all that grown up stuff, the fact that you would spend time messing around with me pleases me no end.

I hope you never come to your senses and carry on with your subscription to my fanclub (I’ve signed you up for life, the Wildebeest are so happy to have you on board, your calving knowledge is invaluable.) When I read back the whole story, I can see the improvements you made to the final chapter and I remember the fun of the betazoid banter behind it and it makes me want to go again.

So, despite its inadequacy, I’m going to say thanks. And stay off the meds, I like you just the way you are.

Kirsty x

ooh, that sounds like a sequel!

and it was very much worth the wait! Poor Sammy. And I thought you had a foot fetish? Though foot vs backside ain't gonna be much of a contest...

fab, funny and fantastic! as always!

Author's Response:

Three reviews in one day?  Now that's appreciation!

Sequel is a possibility.  I don't have a foot fetish, I'm a broad shoulders, big hands kinda girl.  The naked feet are always for the lovely Bev who is a total foot perv.

Thanks for all of the reviews.  I'm glad you enjoyed the story.

Kirsty x

Hmm... who'd want to see them all sweaty and beating things up? I wonder...

and oh, it's a cliffie alright! A soggy, picturesque (Dean and fireflies, luverly, missus!) cliffie - and boy I'm glad I missed enough updates to not have to wait!

Author's Response:

Well, it's the closest I'll likely ever get to a cliffie, anyway. 

So, you like Dean soggy and sweaty and beating things up?  Maybe by the light of a firefly or ten?  It's a niche market but I'll bear that in mind.

Kirsty x

Can I just say wow!  That was great.  You went to Dean's abs and the water going down and I thought, "No, she won't go there."  And then you did!  Awesome. 

Now to be serious, beautiful descriptions.  I applaud your attention to detail and the sacrifices you make for your research.  I hope there are no linger charges for you. 

Now, really seriously, I laughed through the whole thing.  Laughed out loud, tears in my eyes while brushing them away desperately in order to be able to read more.  And the ending was perfect...payback is a bitch for a distracted Dean!

Write more, you are very good at this.

Author's Response:

Ahh Kim, never underestimate the depths to which an Essex girl will sink.  Anyway, he'd had a rough few days, he deserved a little fun.  Bloody spoil sport Sam.

Thanks very much for the prompt to begin with and the support throughout. 

Kirsty x

Just brilliant.

Very funny, i'll be sorry to see this story end.

Author's Response:

What a fantastic compliment, thank you very much.  I'm sure Dean'll be pleased to get away from that darn swamp though.  After a nice long shower, of course...

Cheers!

Kirsty x

Kirsty,

You had me laughing out loud, that was great.  The mud wrestling was wonderful although knowing the terrible smell was always there too the true...enjoyment....out of the situation.  I loved your conclusion to the hunt, not the usual bells and whistles which was a nice change.  I liked that the guys appreciated the reunion of the two lovers and the beauty of the situation.

VERY much looking forward to a couple of shower scenes (thank you for two, don't want just one -- together or not). 

Thanks for this story.  It was a great read, I enjoyed every bit of it.  I look forward to your next!  I really, really do!

Kim

Author's Response:

Hi Kim,

Well it is all thanks to you for giving me the motivation to begin with (even if you did opt out of the childcare part!)

Thank you for everything, your support means a lot.

Kirsty xx

Kirst!

Wooha think I'm gonna be first reviewer...yeah dance of crazy mud wrestling happiness!!

What can I say Bird other than this is a cool last line to end all cool last lines.  You are a genius of understated craziness and I adore your delightful Biy totty depravity (especially your new genre story!) to bits.

More Birdy magic soon babe!   

Bird to Bird xxxxx

Author's Response:

Hello my little barmpot!

Did the boys join in with your little mud mambo?  That'd be a sight worth seeing!

My special stories are just for you, something to put you to sleep at night.  And I hope you have very sweet dreams, Hunny.

Kirst xxx

Loved Dean's reasons why he hates this job,very funny.

Author's Response:

Well, he's been having a hard time, poor thing, needs to let off steam somehow.  Thanks very much for reviewing.

Kirsty x

Great update!  Don't know why but I love a sniffling, snuffling, congested Dean to pieces.  LOL

And, yep, that's pretty much a cliffhanger ending.  Can't wait for the next chapter.

Author's Response:

Yeah, he is kinda cute like that, isn't he?  You know, in a butch and macho way of course.

Glad you're enjoying and thanks for reviewing.

Kirsty x

great update.i'm loving this story it's hilarious.

Author's Response:

I'm glad you're enjoying it.  Thanks for the review.  Kirsty x

I love the idea of Dean having allergies, it's just too delicious after the big macho image he portrays, and that coupled with the picture of him as a boy scout? Wrong on SO many levels...lol

Also loved the 'why aren't old peoples homes next to graveyards' idea...laughed out loud at that one...

This is shaping up to be such a great story, enjoying every chapter.

XX Louy

Author's Response:

Hi Louy,

Snuffly Dean is pretty adorable, or gross I suppose, depending on whether or not your Sam...

As for the Scout thing; Bev wanted me to put in some rude bits about woggles, but I restrained myself.  This is serious literature after all!

Thanks so much for reviewing.

Kirsty xx