Reviewer: birdie (Signed)
28/03/08 07:57 AM · On:
I thought I'd start again because I read the first chapter when it came out and then I've fallen behind with my reading. So...there are so many lines in here that I think are wonderful. Your writing is so elegant and restrained. The characters so rounded and easy to visualise. I admire your style hugely.
Particular lines i like are:
"Tension sat like a third party on the seat between them" so evocative.
"Dean froze. For a moment every bruise still visible throbbed and those buried deep whimpered with need" - the word whimpered is just a goosebumps sort of word.
"Lashes long enough to portray youth blinked up to reveal green eyes that had left innocence behind. Abe found his gut knotting as he waited to hear the first words uttered as Dean focused on him." - I love the dicotomy of this sentence, I think I forget sometimes how young Dean really is...and of course the lashes thing is always a winner!
I love Abe, he can see straight to Dean's soul and I think he is destined to be his guardian and jeeze if anyone needs a guardian it's Dean.
Sorry, blathering on!
Hey Bev! How fantastic to see you! Thanks so much for starting over and offering me your encouragement chapter by chapter. Lord knows I need all I can get. :)
I'm glad you liked those lines. I wanted them to make an impact. And blather away as long as you like. I never tire hearing from you.
Thanks for reading!!
Reviewer: rbliss1969 (Signed)
23/03/08 05:03 AM · On:
Well you did it again another great story!!
i was not pleased when i finished chapter 6 and there was no more..................
i knew when i first started to read that it was not completed but i got so wrapped in i forgot...
Abe what a great character so strong yet so needing of Dean and Sam.
i like that Dean and Lobo connected and i especially liked how you described why Dean and Lobo where the same.
it is so true how wolves defend and protect each other in a pack the loyalty they have for each other; so Dean.
and lets not forget the fact that Lobo is part Dog the loyalty and the fact that dogs forgive so quickly no matter how bad they might be treated......no matter what a dog will always trust and love its true owner.
and Sam being the Eagle how true is that the strength and power Sam has without really understanding that he has it.
i know it is wrong but i have no sympathy for Sal what a...well you know; he deserves what ever he gets.
hope that chapter 7 and others will be coming soon; til then i will be waiting patiently.
Awww -- I'm sorry you got to the end of 6 and had to wait!! I'm working on 7 now, I swear. I know what you mean about starting WIPs and then having to wait -- can be frustrating! But I hope not to lose you as I continue to tell this story. It's a part of me and I need to have it told.
If all goes well, 7 will be posted by the end of this week.
Thank you so much for reading and for your lovely comments. I read them multiple times before replying.
Reviewer: Oceane (Signed)
22/03/08 01:26 PM · On:
The last two chapters're so intense and suspenseful. Gaelic, you brought so much emotion in this story. You know how to keep us at the edge of our seat. I'm glad that you extended your story to eight chapters, I don't want it to end yet. Can't wait for your next installment.
Oceane -- you're such a sweetie, thank you so much for your continued reviews. I always giggle a little when I see you over here as I've been used to seeing you on the VS.
Speaking of, SJ and I have finished episode 4, Devil Inside, and it will be airing next Tuesday the 1st. If you read, I hope you enjoy. It's my last story there, her first story there, so we wanted to make it special.
Best to you always -- and THANK YOU for reading.
Reviewer: Phoenix_Song778 (Signed)
21/03/08 03:55 PM · On:
There were so many things I liked about this chapter, it's hard to know where to start! I think I'll start with Bobby. This is the first story of yours to feature Bobby, so when his name came up I was pretty excited to see your version of him. I knew you would stay true to the character because you're you, but there was definitely a feeling of anticipation. and true to form, you did not disappoint--Bobby was everything his is on the show--gruff, capable and affectionate (in a manly way of course!). I'm really intrigued about his relationship with Maggie. It seems as if there is a lot of water under that particular bridge and I'm eager to get a glimpse into what they were to each other.
I also really loved the symbolism of the animals carved into the charms for each of the boys. Dean's being the wolf, makes clearer his connection to Lobo as well as signifying the hunter and protector. Sam has an eagle--an animal that always makes me think of strength and power...and after witnessing Sam push the ikiryoh out of his body and into Sal's, it's pretty clear that he has both in spades. And while that power is impressive, I can't help but find it a little frightening as well.
And when Sal started reliving the night he and his gang attacked Claire...oh my god!! I swear all the breath left my body when it became apparent where Mine. Soon. Taken. had come from. That she had heard them and poured that into the ikiryoh created such a horribly powerful moment...pure genius!! It really was like a punch to the gut!
A couple of other things I loved: the fact that Sam does not completely trust Lobo is interesting; Sam's comparison of his hands with Dean's--a great emotional contemplation; and finally loved this line: "His reaching fingers brushed against air, thick and palpable with circumstance." What a beautiful line--like poetry.
I should also tell you that I visited your LJ page and am really excited that you're going to be writing some original fiction. As much as I absolutely adore your Supernatural fanfic (and am glad you'll be continuing with it) I think that writing original works will allow you to flex your creative muscles in different ways and knowing how strong those muscles are already, I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with!
I'm going to reply from the bottom up -- THANK YOU for visiting the LJ page. I hope that as I get time and guts to post I get to see your reactions there as well. The best thing about fanfic, aside from getting to imagine these boys in these situations, is that you have already established characters, histories, and voices to work from. You have to match that in most cases, but you don't have to create it.
I'm looking forward to creating a character that captivates me as much as Dean has, or antagonizes me as much as Sam does. We'll see if I've got the moxy, yeah?
Thank you so much for calling out the lines and scenes that spoke to you -- that means SO MUCH to me. I write like spilling words on paper and they all work inside my head and it's only when I see reviews like yours that I relax into the knowledge that they made sense to others as well.
Thank you so much for reading, for reviewing, for sticking with me. Sometimes I worry...but I write because I must and I simply hope that others enjoy.
Oh, and I have another song for you... "Dance with You" by Ryan Star. I have fallen in love with his voice -- saw JessicaRae's "Here Son" vid and immediate searched for him. Both are on the playlist for writing this next chapter.
Reviewer: Deanwinchesterfan1985 (Signed)
21/03/08 01:23 PM · On:
Great chapter again. I really enjoyed it. I was glad to see Sal get what was coming to him and at the same time Sam was able to rid himself of that thing. Now their biggest problem at hand seems to be destroying that thing. Hopefully they will be able to, now that it has escaped Sal. Evil little thing isn't it?
Then there is poor Dean but at least Abe was able to get some medication for him. And since Sam was able to rid himself of that thing he was there to help Dean out. Although Dean is going to die when he finds out that Sam stripped him to his boxers to put him in the shower. At least the fever is going down though, pretty scary how sick he has gotten because of this injury. You said things are going to get worse for him before they get better? Hmm...well I'll be looking forward to it!
Not only has the poor boy been stripped to his boxers, but his boxers were taken from him by Bobby to help cool him down. *smirks*
I've seen untreated wounds turn deadly in very little time without aid, so I wanted to try to throw that one last obstacle in their path before allowing things to improve... they have one more chapter of struggle before the story can end.
But one thing I try to do is end on a peaceful--if not completely positive--note.
I hope you'll stick with me -- thanks so much for reading!
Reviewer: star76 (Signed)
20/03/08 10:34 PM · On:
Yay, it’s going to be eight chapters! That’s fine by me! I’m going to try and keep this review short tonight! So – the good bits:
Sams struggle with the ikiryoh, trying to prevent it from taking him.
Deans misery as he fights through the fever, hanging on for Sam.
The explanation for the three different words Dean, Sam, & Abe heard in the bar.
The whole shower scene, Sams desperation that Dean has his own rules when it comes to being ill. Bobby coming in to help Sam out.
Bobbys comments about Sam’s power – is there more to be revealed here?
Lobo's hurt?? Oh no Gaelic, I hope he’s back in the next chapter.
Sal and the skin ripping – gross, just gross. At least he finally got what he deserved, even if it was a gruesome way to go.
Loved it, loved it, loved it! Looking forward to more of conscious Dean in the next chapter! Now that Sal’s dead, and the ikiryoh is more powerful, who is it going for next? I have an idea, but I’ll wait to see what you come up with.
Fantastic, sorry I didn’t have time for more detail this time around. Can’t wait for the next instalment.
Stella! Thanks so much for taking time away from that adorable puppy to read and review. I appreciate it muchly.
No worries on detail, girl, what you put sent a smile to my face and rejuvenated my fingers. I'm ready to keep writing now.
Best to you always,
Reviewer: jane (Signed)
20/03/08 12:27 PM · On:
What a lot of pain and hurt going on in this chapter, both physical and emotional.
But first to Sam and his awful battle with the ikiryoh (I have to check the spelling of that everytime) and clever lad realising only he could rid himself of it.
I did rather wonder if he would later wish he'd not put it into Sal, as he's a softie at heart, but even if he does I believe that if Dean survivies its a mental demon he will be able to deal with.
If Dean weren't so poorly the vision of him in the shower would have been a very pleasant one, but he's a darn sick boy. Sam using his childhood knowledge to cool him down, and getting desperate as it didn't seem to be working, bless in comparison his childhood fever was probs half of what Dean is dealing with. Then help arrives with our Bobby and Abe getting the medicine- he's got a fighting chance now - and its all hopefully coming together (and am sure you will spoil my illusion in the next chapter, but I'm enjoying the moment!)
Poor Maggie, cool that she's based on Thru Terry's Eye's I've read her bio and I can see the connection there. Though in my minds eye Maggie is heaps older! I sense an unrequitted love in Bobby/Maggie? I wonder why he left, if you say there is more about Maggie later, I hope that you touch on her relationship with Bobby.
Dean gave away lots of little gems in his fever. I did one of those sharp intakes of breath when I read that his dad sang to Sam and Sam's reaction, fab
And can we have a check on Lobo, my favourite fictional animal is possibly hurt and I'm worrying, Gaelic.
And finally, as you do so well, a cliffy (on a side, I'd been shouting at Bobby to pick his gun back up, having put in down on the table I was so worried that Sal in his deranged state would get to it.) And now the-thing-i-can't-spell has got out of Sal and I have a feeling that the sh** is about to hit the fan.
I offer you a Lindt chocolate bunny as my virtual easter gift to you; I recommend eating the ears first, they are so thick its enough for one munching session.
Happy Easter and god bless.
Hi Jane! Sorry I took so long to reply -- traveled for work, was without Internet, and then went to a soccer game last night and froze my fingers off! Well, not exactly, but darn close.
I'm thrilled that you enjoyed this chapter. I've been writing this entire story while also working on my last VS story with SJ and now that last two chapters can unfold without distraction. I hope they work for you.
The shower scene was crystal clear in my head, so I'm happy that you enjoyed it. And don't worry about Lobo. I promised Nana56 that the dog would come out okay in the end, and I never go back on a promise.
*takes chocolate bunny greatfully*
Thanks so much for reading and for sticking with me. I look forward to seeing what you think of the rest.
Reviewer: mymuseandi (Signed)
20/03/08 11:47 AM · On:
"Shit, man, don't do this!" Sam shook him again. "Please don't do this… the shower always worked for me… it always cooled me down… you can't have different rules, okay? You're not allowed!"
This line just shows that these boys can show love to one another without resorting to mushiness....and yup, i can totally imagine these words said by Sam....
On Yeats dying...well...i did say the bloodthirsty part of me wants him dead, but i didn't get any satisfaction after reading about him shot and that half of his face is gone...and i think his daughter is the one who pulled the trigger....
I missed Dean too, in this chapter.... i love Sam for doing the shower routine, just like Dean did for him when he was younger, even though it leads to some angsty moments... and Dean always has to be half alive before revealing any secrets.......sigh....
PS: missed the jukebox too... thank god for Bobby singing.... :)
Always gotta find music. I heard in a movie once that if you play it loud enough, it keeps the demons at bay. :)
I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter and liked that line. I get wrapped up in feeling their desperation and it's only when I surface for air that I hope it makes sense.
Thanks for sticking with me, muse, and I hope you enjoy the next parts.
Reviewer: lostatc (Signed)
20/03/08 09:51 AM · On:
I loved this chapter. They all feel so desperate right now. I can't wait to really figure out the relationship between Maggie and Bobby. I look forward to Sam and Dean finally facing some of the issues they're drowning in at the moment.
Thanks for a great read.
Hey! Thanks so much for reviewing and taking time to read. I am working on Chapter 7 now where a lot of what you're looking forward to comes out... the rest of course happening in the final chapter.
I hope you enjoy -- would hate to let you down now. :)
Best to you,
Reviewer: bulletbabe (Signed)
20/03/08 05:33 AM · On:
I could taste Sam's anguish in this chapter, both with his own situation and his brothers pain...and it's a great nod to his changing character on the show that he was willing to knowingly sacrifice Sal to the monster inside.
Absolutely LOVED this line...'The rain had tapered leaving in its wake the sensation of crispness in the air and the scent of newness mixed with the earthy smell of mud and leaves and life. Pulling in a breath, Abe shifted his eyes to the bar and its darkened windows. He knew what lay within: a broken man and a woman whose innocence had been burned away by betrayal and hatred. Two dangerous combinations.'
I am a sucker for beautiful descriptions and you do write some of the best!
Great to see Doc making an appearance, I loved him in 'Ramble On', another fantastic character and talking of those...I can see Maggie so clearly every time she speaks - I'm sure Thru Terry's Eyes is blown away ...lol
The wolf charm was a beautiful detail and the 'Don't leave me Sam' was heartbreaking.
And I had a surge of joy seeing Sal get his just deserts.
All in all this is yet another fantastic chapter to a fantastic story and I will continue to recomend your work to everyone who asks me.
Great work Amanda. X Louy
Dear, you are too kind. Thank you for this wonderful review. I'm still blushing by your saying that you rec me to anyone who asks.
Thanks again for being such an amazing, loyal reviewer. I truly hope I don't let you down with the last two chapters. *gulp*
Reviewer: NovembersGuest (Signed)
19/03/08 11:23 PM · On:
Oh, yeah...of course that shower scene was hot. I mean, forget for a moment it's Sam holding him and then focus on the images of water, skin, heat and touch. Wet Dean is always hot Dean--even if he his half-dead in the arms of his brother ;).
Okay, what is *wrong* with me... I read "half-dead in the arms of his brother" and I go all shivery...
Sick, I tell you. Sick.
Reviewer: Geena (Signed)
19/03/08 10:42 PM · On:
I was thrilled to see the next chapter. Holy Crap! That was awesome. Loved the action.. The ending most definately creeped me the heck out... ick. I absolutely love how you write the brothers. Their bond is just beautiful. I had to read the chapter a few times before I could sit down and reply. Abe does not disappoint, very happy that Bobby is here to help and of course Lobo! Love him. Can't wait for the next chapter!
Hi Geena! Thanks so much for this -- I'm so pleased you enjoyed this latest chapter. I'm working on Chapter 7 now and really hope I don't let you down. These brother's just get me *clutches heart* right here...
You read as many times as you need and I will always look forward to hearing from you.
Best to you,
Reviewer: Stock1210 (Signed)
19/03/08 09:51 PM · On:
"He had been too young to be embarrassed, too tired to be shy, and too grateful to be disgruntled when Dean had stood, fully clothed, behind him, keeping him from collapsing to the small stall floor, letting the lukewarm water cool his fevered skin. All he remembered for much of those two weeks was the absolute absence of strength and the constant presence of Dean. He hadn't wanted his dad; he'd wanted Dean.".......beautiful.
Thank you. I'm really glad you liked that. I could "see" that scene playing out in my head, so I'm pleased you felt it was done well.
Best to you,
Reviewer: Janger (Signed)
19/03/08 07:13 PM · On:
Oh Lord, what a nightmare image you have left us with here, the black eyed, just crawled from dead body, glowing, gray skinned, innocent faced horror, smiling at them. Now how am I ever going to get to sleep tonight??!!
Yet another superb chapter, throwing us mercilessly from one crisis to the next, lulling me into a false sense of security with everyone having a nice doze, Sam on the road to recovery and Deans' temperature finally coming round. Then that wet, ripping sound brought an end to all that relaxation. The words "I'm Back", spring to mind......lol.
It's great having Bobby on the scene, his arrival was almost like pressing the reset button, you could almost feel the sense of relief from Sam when he arrived and immediately started to take charge. There's obviously a lot of history between Maggie, Yeats and Bobby, I'm looking forward to learning more about that.
I just can't find it in me to feel any compassion for Sal, he was rotten to the core. I'm torn between feeling sorry for Claire and really not liking her, she's had a really rough deal along the way but she is suitably bitter and twisted. I'm worried about poor Lobo, what has Claire done to him, I hope Dean doesn't get to lose him.
Please update soon, I can't wait to see where that Ikiryoh is off to next and just what is going to happen to Dean if things get worse before they get better! So much to look forward to. Thanks. Jane
Sorry for the sleepless night. Sorta. *grin*
I'm so glad you are enjoying this story -- it is my one wish, to be entertaining as a storyteller. There is more to come about Maggie, Yeats, and Bobby, but also about what the boys survive and what the learn from this experience.
A childhood lost is something both boys can relate to on some level, and while Claires was stolen from her violently, Dean and Sam have some scars in that area as well...
No worries on Lobo. The dog must live. It's my rule. :)
Thanks again! Best to you,
Reviewer: Vanessa (Signed)
19/03/08 06:13 PM · On:
Fantastic chapter, Gaelic. I had a sneaking suspicion that Maggie was based on Terry!!! I'm glad you know I was correct! And I love the character of Maggie. I also love the fact that things are gonna get a little worse for poor Dean before they get better. Sick individual that I am, I smiled at that.
HAH! I love that you suspected that. :) I remembered you'd met her, and might possibly remember the tattoo and short, spiky hair. And if you're sick, then so am I...
Thanks SO much for reading. I love to see you here. I hope to see more of you!
Reviewer: britany k (Signed)
19/03/08 05:24 PM · On:
I finally figured out who Abe is to me. Have you ever seen any of the Free Willy movies? There is a Native American character named Randolf. He's my Abe! It didn't hit me until my son was watching the movie last night. Funny how the subconsious works!
This chapter was just WOW!!!
Yay Sammy! for having the strength to rid himself of the Ikyroh and I can't think of a better person for it to attack.... but now what? It sure ate through Sal fast and mighnt I say EEEEEWWW!
Now Sammy can take care of Dean and Bobby's there! So far, I love the way you write Bobby, so true to character.
Poor Dean. He's so hurt. How much more can our poor boy take? Yet he always wins in the end.
I wasn't expecting Yeats to die. Did the guilt make him kill himself or was it Claire?
I'm looking forward to reading more of Maggie's story.
Looking forward to the next chapter!
Your Abe is August Shellenberg and is pretty darn close to my Abe, who in my mind is "played" by Graham Greene (from Dances with Wolves). His image is on the far right of the banner bulletbabe created for the story. I love that you have an image in your head -- that's awesome! :)
As far as Yeats... you'll have to read to find out. If I do it right, all will be explained in the end... I'm glad you're looking forward to Maggie's story. And yeah, Dean... our consumate hero, yeah? He will take more... because that's how I see him... but you're right, he always wins in the end. And that's why we love him.
Thanks so much for reading and reviewing! I love to see you name in my inbox!
Reviewer: Midge (Signed)
19/03/08 04:04 PM · On:
Great chapter, as per usual Gaelic. Though I must admit the lack of argument from Abe about releasing Sam surprised me, as did the 'relative' ease with which Sam exorcised the beast from within himself.
But what a cliff-hanger. Who will the beast attack next? From those left in the room my guess would be Maggie - she strikes me as the most 'expendable' character and also the one to cause most angst by being possessed.
Oh well, here's hoping RL allows the next chapter to be posted soon rather than later.
Well... your guess is a logical one... but as my husband will tell you, I don't tend to follow the safe lines of logic... And there is still much to explain. Hopefully I do it to your satisfaction.
Thanks for the being candid about the events that surprised you. In my mind I saw Abe's realization that Sam was calmer, more lucid thanks to the pilocarpine as the pendulum swinging toward releasing him... but that may be because I know a future you haven't seen yet. That's a good storytelling lesson for me.
Also, Sam's ability to exorcise the ikiryoh from himself was one of those things that came to him thanks to the calm offered by the pilocarpine and the knowledge that the charm protected him from internal...rape, for lack of a better word.
But again, I need to make sure to remember to step in the readers shoes and really assess what's believable and what's convenient. Thanks for that. :)
Best to you --
Reviewer: ReccaF (Signed)
19/03/08 01:22 PM · On:
Where to start...totally AWESOME!!!!!!!!!
This was just jam packed with Wincherterism, interaction, angst, action-everything that we all love about the boys wrapped in the perfect package!!!
Dean's unfailing need to protectSam , save Sam, to have a physical contact with his grounding force that is Sam-
Sam-his inner demons surfacing , the ikiryoh trying to take total control of him, Sam's strength shown when he realizes that he must expell the ikiryoh to save Dean-
OUTSTANDING writing from a great writer.
Abe- realizing that his meeting up with the boys again comes to him at a crossroads of his belief. When he sees that the charms from Bobby-the Eagle for Sam and the Wolf for Dean- these 2 powerful symbols of the Native people-the far seeing and the teacher/protector-it all blends-I came hear the drums when they are mentioned-OUTSTANDING !!!!!!!!!!!
Bobby- again, the second father figure for the boys - his love of them coming thru the phone to Abe-perfect in every way.
Sam's comment to Dean- "Who is your brother" - trust, brotherly love, anguish at the other's pain-jumps off the pages.
The ikiryoh free agin-excellent work!!!!!!
Hey! Thanks so much for reading and for this fantastically long review. Whee! The wolf for Dean, eagle for Sam will become clearer in the coming chapters, but I loved that you called it out. And I'm so pleased you liked Bobby's return.
Hope you like what is to come -- I'm looking forward to writing chapter 7, but want it to work for you guys, too, so... I'm nervous. Hee.
Reviewer: Harlech (Signed)
19/03/08 01:18 PM · On:
Knew there was a reason I don't generally read uncompleted stories... here I am sat on the edge of my seat, waiting with baited breath for the next chapter and you've only just posted this one! Hoping you'll be kind and take pity on a starving Reader (g). I love the Sam angst in this story. It kinda fits with what I think of Sam sometimes. He's a good guy but a self-centered as if everything revolves around him. It makes human instead of a goody-two shoes. I also like Dean's desperate need to justify his life by saving Sam. I blame his father for that. They're almost at the opposite ends of the spectrum - Sam thinking only of Sam and Dean thinking nothing of Dean but everything of Sam.
I love reading your stories they're great with fantastic plot and brilliant character depths so please please please keep it up!
Aww... I'm sorry to leave you hanging so precariously! I am out of the woods with some rather pressing issues in RL and hope to have Chapter 7 posted by a week from Sunday... does that help?
I totally love how you saw Sam -- and I agree. I don't think his selfishness is entirely his fault... he's never had to care for anyone but himself (and by 'care' I mean 'take care of' not 'love') and Dean was never allowed to care for just himself.
Only... you said it better. :)
Thanks so much for reading and taking time to review. You have no idea how much that means to me. Better than chocolate.
Reviewer: POOKEE (Signed)
18/03/08 12:23 PM · On:
This story is a unique look at the men of Winchester, although battling the physical demon at hand, the story excels at its autopsy of the battle both these men have been waging against their own inner demons. Your simplistic words signify the bond between the brothers, however disfunctional the bond evolved, it still provides the foundations for their lives and the demons within. The simple question of "Dean?" followed by "I'm here" speaks of the strength of their bond. The men's need for physical closeness solidifies the bond but also quells a need in them to feel that very bond - to regain the comfort with one another - to trust one another again. One can see through Dean's thoughts, the deep cuts his father inflicted on his sons - duties assessed well beyond their years - Dean watch out for Sammy. Abe mimicks John's authoritativeness through his orders to Dean - "Dean stick with your brother, don't let him out of your sight". Dean again is called upon to be the soldier his father had cultivated, snaps to attention and into focus - Sammy. Again, through all the pain and disappointment these men have been through, their overpowering sense of family and devotion will ride them through the healing process. Sam has memorized Dean's smell, his exact movements, his inner soul extracted from the stories held in Dean's eyes. The healing begins with the men through the simple utterance of "Sorry" and "You don't have to be" - these phrases spoken and heard on a whole different plain than the one they were uttered in. The walls between the two brothers begin to crumble as Dean admits "I'm barely hanging on" and Sam's determination to be his strength. How fitting that the entity they search is a symbol of a childhood lost, innocence destroyed, duty before freedom. The very things these men seek to find, to rebuild, to come to terms with. Abe so dearly achieves what John never could with Sam - civility. He physically reassures Sam that healing will come to those who will let it, that it is possible to forgive without forgetting - and yet not affecting the men's need of each other's love - not to forget in darkness what we learn in the light.
God Bless and Keep You,
You're gonna make me cry. Not that that's too hard these days, but, I thank you for this. Sincerely. Your reviews are always treasured, Pook. They come from you heart and I know when I read them that you've not only ready my story -- which on it's most basic level is meant to entertain -- but you've also read *me*. And there are elements of each writer in every story, yeah?
The childhood lost is something I can relate to -- but you see right through to what I'm intended to tell... the ikiryoh isn't simple the result of an evil spell... it's a symbol of something both Sam and Dean have to come to grips with.
And I hope that as I weave the final two chapters, I can bring the paths of this story together to form a journey that was worth your time.
Best to you always,
Reviewer: ReccaF (Signed)
11/03/08 12:21 PM · On:
Where to begin- this was just so totally AWESOME!!!!!!
Ok.. Abe, he's finally remembering more of the first meeting with the boys- the true 2 parts of the same whole-one without the other is not possible.
Sammy's need of Dean- Dean's need to protect and save his brother- tears and cheers came together. The boys can do anything as long as they do it together.
Lobo- true friend and protector to Dean- totally ready to save the brothers from that dirt bag Sal-OUTSTANDING writing!!!!!
Lobo- as a healing spirit for Abe- great imaging and connection- Abe finally touching Wolf brother-EXCELLENT!!!!!
Bobby-as always the other parent to the Winchester boys- Abe's first encounter with our expert in demons.an eye opener for Abe- heartbreaking as Bobby realizes again- Sam and Dean are in dire straits-AWESOME job!!!!!!!!
This has been just one PERFECT PACKAGE -timing verbage-tenor-emotions running riot-Abe again in there to help-superior work from a true master!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you so much for this. Your reviews are always so full of life and energy. I so enjoy seeing them. Thank you very sincerely for the time you spend with my words and the time you take to review. I'm thrilled you're enjoying the cadence of this tale, and truly hope you continue to do so as I roll out Chapter 6. It will be posted by the 19th.
Reviewer: Kumaproogey (Signed)
10/03/08 07:25 PM · On:
Incredibly vivid descriptions that transports the reader & put them in the midst of the story. Intriguing plot that had me hooked from the very beginning.
Example of your uniquely description sentence that is simple but not seen much in fanfiction or even published books:
Lashes long enough to portray youth blinked up to reveal green eyes that had left innocence behind. Abe found his gut knotting as he waited to hear the first words uttered as Dean focused on him.
You write the brothers (together & separate) perfectly. Their words, actions, mannerisms, thoughts – everything!The scene with the “whiskey eyes” (chapter 2) was incredible. I could completely picture the scene & it didn’t seem ridiculous (which was a risk) & it was a strong piece that was incredibly well written.
Wow -- you've humbled me with this. I thank you for the compliment about description. I see a picture in my head and try to find the right words to let you see the same thing. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but I'm thrilled that it worked for you.
You're right -- the whiskey eyes could have been a total flop, I'm glad you found it believable. I'm such a wuss...it kinda freaked me out writing it because I saw the liquid moving up the wall and got goosebumps. *shivers*
I'm so glad you see the brothers in how I write them. They are amazing characters, aren't they? I hope you continue to enjoy.
Reviewer: star76 (Signed)
08/03/08 06:12 PM · On:
As usual, another fantastic addition to the tale you are weaving. The movie may not have been playing well in your mind, but it was in technicolour in mine!! Seriously, when reading your work, the world closes in around me to focus on the words I am reading, and by the end of the chapter I am not aware I am reading at all, the images in my mind are so strong. So you had nothing to worry about with this one!!
Deans despair at Sam being possessed again, this scene totally makes me think of the expression on his face in Born under a Bad Sign when he tells Sam how hard he’s tried to keep him safe. His struggle to hang on, keep control over his own weakness from the injuries, as always insisting that he “is fine”, when clearly he is not.
Deans thoughts in relating to Claire, thinking that he is the last on his Dads list of important things in life….. that Sam would never have been possessed if John was there….that he isn’t good enough. I agree with Bobby, will Dean ever learn that he is good enough, learn that he is more than just Sams protector, learn to love & have faith in himself?
And of course, Sam – having all of his darkest, guiltiest, and most negative thoughts trawled trough and amplified by the ikiryoh. Both of these boys need some serious self-esteem boosting!! The description of the ikiryoh inside Sam, the fingers crawling underneath his skin – very creepy.
Hhhm, some possible love interest for Bobby! Wow, didn’t see that one coming. I am curious to see what happens between him Maggie and when he arrives, and hopefully he will be able to help the boys out in this battle against the ikiryoh and the darkness it brings. No-one can replace John as the boys father, but I like to think of Bobby as a favourite Uncle! I love that in the show they have begun to bring out his fatherly side with the boys, and that he sees Dean as more than just a soldier, he sees him as a person, and Bobby does have faith in Dean.
Sal - I’d totally forgotten about him. I think subconsciously I was hoping that a bear had eaten him in the woods!! When will Dean get a break? As if he doesn’t have enough to worry about at the moment. I love your description of Dean taking the gun from Sal, focusing his world down to a heartbeat, very clever. Hey, and Lobo’s here, perfect. Dean is always busy worrying about protecting everyone else, and now he has someone selflessly protecting him for a change.
Wow, what an amazing chapter. If the next one is pivotal, I can’t wait. So much has happened, and now they are in so deep, I am beginning to worry they aren’t going to get out of it. But I know you Gaelic, you torture them, but you always save them in the end!
This is quite possibly the longest review I have ever written, I think your chapter lengths are inspiring me!! That and the fact that I should be outside shovelling 30cm of snow off my driveway and I am trying to delay the inevitable!!
Keep up the good work, looking forward to the next instalment
Stella -- I think I love you. These reviews of yours... just incredible! Thank you so much for taking the time to let me know all that you're thinking as you read. Just... fabulous.
You're right. I like to push them to their limits, but the definition of a hero in my estimation is one that can overcome the odds... plus, there are at least three chapters left. :)
I'm with you -- thinking of Bobby like a favorite Uncle. I saw him in an episode of CSI the other day and was like... what is up with Bobby?? Hee. This show certainly has made an impact, hasn't it?
Thanks again for your time with me and I hope you enjoy the rest.
Reviewer: maria noel (Signed)
08/03/08 12:14 PM · On:
oooooh mean girl!!! you can´t be so cruel with my little boys :(
my poor Dean is so ill that he can´t be the great big bro as usual...and my tiny Sammy is so screw(sorry sp) .....but LOBO to the rescue and YAY Bobby!!!!!!
keep writing missy i so need to know what´s going to happend.........
No worries -- I'm still writing. :) I hope to have another chapter up for you when you get back from the hospital (are you still doing that?) next week.
Thanks so much for reading!!
Reviewer: teneniel2 (Signed)
07/03/08 10:33 PM · On:
I love Lobo.
I was so pleased to see another chapter to this nail-biter-of-a-story.
Whatever you did to get the world to back off must have worked because this chapter was awesome! Thanks again for sharing this wonderful piece of fanfic!
Thanks so much! I'll tell you, the right music and those little earbuds work wonders when the world closes in. :)
I'm so glad you liked this chapter -- hope you enjoy what's to come!