Reviewer: Star (Signed) · Date: 17/09/10 08:40 PM · On: Torture for Torture's Sake
I have so many mxed feelings about this story. Not about its awesomeness, that is a given, an undeniable fact kinda like breathing Oxygen is necessary for life. The torture scenes were amazing, this is great in terms of detail and description, shows research done. I was thoroughly impressed. i cannot even express how much. I have always thought that children are our best selves. They accept without prejudice are kind to a fault and choose right most times. Not always but most times. And I think that's wwhy Ben chose good. He just didn't have the shades of grey that develop in adults after time and pain get in the way. And I get why he is angry at Sam. Sam, like Ben says knows right and still chooses wrong. And I get that. I so get that. We do it all the time. We know its wrong to lie but we still do. So I think I understand Sam and its no excuse just is. And Dean has hit the nail on the head. Sam was raised and protected constantly and that made him a lil selfish but his motivations are still underlined by care. He loves Dean and Ben to a fault but he wants to be free of the pain and the sometimes crushing responsibility. ANd i get that. I so identify with each of the boys perspectives nad that is what makes this story great. Hope you like long reviews for this was a doozy! rofl!
Author's Response: I love long reviews but they usually breed longer replies from me so I hope you're prepared. The torture was very thoroughly researched, it's strangely one of my "things." I've always been fascinated by it and the impact it can have on people whether it be a Stolkholm Syndrome type thing or the actual physical ramifications. In this particular story's case I wanted to explore Sam and Ben separate of Dean in conjunction with Ben being threatened while Sam was hurt. Basically I wanted to show the connection that has developed between Ben and Sam on a deeper level. For Dean the ultimate torture wouldn't be pain, it'd be knowing what was happening to those he loved without being able to do anything about it. Until this point he'd always been able to take action in Ben's life (since Ben came into his care) but this is the first time as a parent that his love for his son is at someone else's mercy and he could directly see it but do nothing about it. As a parent there is nothing worse than watching impending doom for your child. Choices are always key in my Ben stories and I think this is one of the first times that I really throw the ambiguity of choices in the character's faces. One of things I try to bring home is the Nihilistic philosophy that there really are no wrong choices, only wrong outcomes to those choices. As Sam processes through the reality of his power and uses Ben to guide him through that process, he has to learn how to recognize the possible outcomes and whether he's willing to face those outcomes - "sleep at night" so to speak. So, from a philosophical stand point, if I were to murder and accept the consequences for that murder, is my choice to murder (for me alone) a wrong choice? It's only when we learn to accept the societal dictates as a determination of our standards of right and wrong that we move away from the selfishness of "I can do whatever I please." Or as Wiccans put it "'An it harm none, do what ye will'" Ben is wonderfully still so young and I completely agree with your assessment, youth often makes our choices idealistic and simplistically easy because we just don't have the outlying factors to taint our views. Ben is in a difficult situation, still rather pure at heart and yet deeply enmeshed in a very dark world, as his father and uncle were at his age. Sadly, as we can see from Sam's journey into adulthood, those outside influences can strip away any semblance of right and wrong and leave an individual floundering in the dark for some guidance. Thanks for the review, especially the long one, I love it. I hope my superficial understanding of philosophy didn't leave you stratching your head and wondering what world I really come from. lostatc
Reviewer: Star (Signed) · Date: 14/09/10 11:19 PM · On: A Walk on the Wild Side
Another great story. I love Ben's integration into the Winchester family. I particularly like this story because of the conflict between Sam and Dean about Ben. I was wondering when that would happen. Also SNAFU and FUBAR caught my eye. So funny! lol! Again great story!
Author's Response: It was bound to happen, wasn't it? The conflict that is. Dean and Sam will always be two different people with very different views on life. Its one of the reasons I wrote these stories, in order to look at Dean and Sam via how they would raise a child. SNAFU and FUBAR - my two favorite terms that I learned from my husbands military career. Thanks again. Kim
Reviewer: Star (Signed) · Date: 12/09/10 11:24 AM · On: To The Rescue
I am seriously a sucker for the boys with a kid. The way how Ben is treated by Sam and Dean in your Ben Series just goes with everything they are. They are caring and loving and stern, all the things a good parent is. Loved how Hendrickson saw the routine and how Ben fit into that as well as the point that he made that John Winchester had trained his sons to be better than him.But I have to say that I am not necessarily a fan of Bobby in your stories. His characterisation seems unduly harsh and the way Dean is so mistrustful of him. It works for your story though. Sam is a great uncle and would make a great dad I think.And the way Dean acts with Ben shows a side of Dean Winchester that I love. The court scene was my favourite scene because we saw character developments in that procession that I could not ignore. An awesome read all in all. And I love the fact that it’s all done so I don’t have to wait for an update! Off to read the next story!
Author's Response: I was never particularly a sucker for the guys with a child but the idea of Ben being Dean's son really grabbed hold with me. I'm to defend my Bobby. At the time that I wrote this I was still very stuck on the fact that in season two it seemed to me that someone knew what they guys were doing and that it could only really be either Bobby, Ellen or Jo. I was casting doubt on all of them because it increased tension. I think, given that information about the guys was getting out, that Dean would be very hesitant about exposing Ben to anyone. As a writer, it causes a reaction in readers when you bring beloved characters into doubt. I don't know how much of the rest of this you've read but I think I do Bobby justice by the end. Thank you so much for a detailed and insightful review. I agree with you, I wrote a different Bobby but that Bobby was from Dean's not-so-trustworthy point of view. Dean was nervous, scared and cautious - only years of conditioning enable him to trust Sam - given seasons 4 and 5 (I started this at the beginning of season 3) I doubt Dean would be that trusting of Sam when it comes to Ben. Again. Thanks. Kim
Reviewer: Star (Signed) · Date: 06/09/10 11:37 AM · On: Choices
I am completely and utterly totally in love with this story. It’s a lot of emotion, a lot of mythology and the addition of Ben to the Winchester clan is epic. It really struck me how detailed you were in pointing out the changes that Ben has wrought on the Winchester’s routine. And Sam serving as another parent filling in where Dean cannot. It was really nice. I never thought that shooting a shotgun with one hand would break your wrists. There were many moments that had be saying awwwwwwwwww and a few choice words came out of my mouth when Amelia was cleansing Ben! The broken Dean when he thought Ben was dead was the most awful thing and I have to say you portrayed it well.Great read!
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it. It was a fun story to write, the series was fun too. I set the length of this story as a challenge to myself, I wanted fine details. It took a long time and a lot of exhausting work. It was worth it though. A shot gun is actually nicnamed a wrist breaker. They can't be shot one handed without damaging the wrist, even for an adult. Gun enthusiasts generally laugh at TV shows where people fire shot guns one handed. Amelia was a fun character, one of my most evil. I liked the idea of an old woman being so powerful. Old people are almost as creepy as little kids. Thanks for the review, I really appreciate it. lostatc
Reviewer: ThePasserby (Signed) · Date: 05/08/10 04:12 AM · On: To The Rescue
*watery smile and sigh*
Author's Response: I don't know how I missed this review. Thank you so much. lostatc
Reviewer: jennie81 (Signed) · Date: 29/07/10 09:55 PM · On: Six Gun Quota
good story clap clap
Reviewer: jennie81 (Signed) · Date: 26/07/10 09:33 PM · On: Tempus Fugit
good story clap clap
Reviewer: jennie81 (Signed) · Date: 20/07/10 09:29 PM · On: Torture for Torture's Sake
good story clap clap
Reviewer: jennie81 (Signed) · Date: 16/07/10 09:21 PM · On: Milk Bottles
good story clap clap
Reviewer: jennie81 (Signed) · Date: 15/07/10 10:17 PM · On: A Walk on the Wild Side
good story clap clap
Reviewer: jennie81 (Signed) · Date: 12/07/10 08:42 PM · On: Choices
good story clap clap
Reviewer: jennie81 (Signed) · Date: 05/07/10 09:49 PM · On: Sword and Shield
good story clap clap
Author's Response: Thank you.
Reviewer: rbliss1969 (Signed) · Date: 04/07/10 08:55 PM · On: Seasons
Kim, wow; i am sad to see the Ben series ending. The stories were excellent. Sam finally choosing good over evil and Dean being the constant protector. Ben now having to be a watcher because of his choice. Chapter 5 had me tearing up. I love the bond between Dean and Ben always have. great job. Renee
Author's Response: I'm sad to see it go too but I feel very satisfied with it. I always knew what was going to happen if not exactly the steps they'd take so it was nice to finally get there. Sorry about the tears. It had me going too. I love Dean and Ben together - now lets cross our fingers and hope the show does these two the service they deserve. Kim
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 01/07/10 07:03 PM · On: Seasons
Great ending! I love the hope for the relationship between Dean and Ben and that Ben being a Watcher is not a punishment for his choice. I'm going to miss this series. thanks for sharing it with me!
Author's Response: I'm so happy that you enjoyed the ending. I know it was a difficult one and that it could have been read many ways. I'm pleased that you took from it what I meant for it to be. I'm going to miss the series also but what has to be, has to be and this one is over. Its a relief actually since the end was always looming but I didn't know when I'd finally say, "yup, this is it." Thanks for reading and for the consistent reviews. It was nice to always know your reviews would be there. Kim
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 30/06/10 05:07 PM · On: Seasons
This was such an emotional chapter! I could feel each man's pain and grief. Poor Ben. His decision hurt not only him but all those who loved him. "He didn't know if the world could take another round of these two at odds." Amen sister! That statement had me laughing and frowning.
Author's Response: Funny enough when I started "To The Rescue" I had every intention of making Bobby a not so good guy in these stories. Not because he was evil but because he could see the inherent danger that exist because of Ben. I bowed to pressure though and brought him around and, due to the line you quoted, I am so happy that I did. It was a fantastic moment for me when Bobby sent Sam out after Dean and forced those two to acknowledge each other's pain. And a huge thank you to Midge because she sent my first draft back and said, "But what about Sam?" I can't wait to find out how you like Chapter 5! Thank you so much. lostatc
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 30/06/10 04:36 PM · On: Seasons
OH MY HECK!!! Genius chapter!! What does this mean? Angela exploded--- definitely no healing her from that. Sam has chosen good but Ben... does this mean he's ultimately chosen evil? When Dean/Michael wakes up he's going to be pissed!
Author's Response: Wow...just wow. Thank you. That was the culmination. I should look up the number of words, pages and stories written that all came to a head in this chapter. Everything I was building toward and there you have it. Again, thank you so much. lostatc
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 29/06/10 04:03 PM · On: Seasons
Angela?! *gasp* I really didn't see that coming. Love how you left it ambiguous enough in the beginning to make us doubt wonder if Ben had anything to do with it and that Enoch was doing something wicked. Dean's statement that demons come at Sam through the people he loves because they can't get to him head on was spot on! I could picture that little scene in my head. Hopefully, Ben will be able to heal Angela after the demon is done wearing her.
Author's Response: I'm bouncing in my seat. I wasn't sure if anyone would mention how Enoch and Ben may have been the bad guys in this particular story but, as always, ultimately this story is about Sam and I needed to draw him in. Sam is easily the most stubborn character I've ever encountered. Even writing him you know that you have to slip in from the side or behind because if he sees you coming head on, you can't do a thing with him. He's damn hard to write. Thanks for reading and for the review, you made me very, very happy. Kim
Reviewer: Shannondoah (Signed) · Date: 29/06/10 03:35 PM · On: Seasons
The last story?! How sad! But I do understand how you need to pursue other projects. A fantastic beginning! As always, you jump us right in the middle of the problem. Very sad that Titus died. I hate that Ben lies to his dad but it does make the tension thicken. I don't trust Enoch. He seems a little weasely to me. You've had me wondering what his ulterior motive is for training Ben since he first appeared. Now that Ben is 16 I'm guessing that he's close to making his decision.
Author's Response: I've read the Lost Book of Enoch and one of the feelings I got from it was the Enoch was a little weasely. I'm glad that the feeling I wanted to convey was there. I think his desires are in the right place but coming from a selfish place. Titus wasn't supposed to die the first time I wrote it but then it occured to me that I needed to up the ante for him. He needed to really feel that animals death so poor Titus was sacrificed. As for the last story, yeah this is it. Ben grew up and moved on - all kids do. He'll always be special in my heart. Thanks for reading and reviewing! Kim
Reviewer: lillelouis (Signed) · Date: 25/06/10 04:47 AM · On: Seasons
Lovely :) And I get the honor of first review! Great job. I've been looking forward for this for so long. So far it's very interesting. Nice work on Enoch ;) Keep it up.
Author's Response: Thank you. Glad you enjoyed. I'm sorry for the long wait but this story was a long time brewing in my head. Hope you enjoy it as it goes along. lostatc
Reviewer: lillelouis (Signed) · Date: 28/03/10 06:32 PM · On: Sword and Shield
I HATE Dr. Elliot.
Author's Response: He is fun to hate, isn't he? I really enjoyed writing him Thanks for reading and reviewing. Kim
Reviewer: zz1989 (Signed) · Date: 20/03/10 06:21 PM · On: Six Gun Quota
I see now by the angels sent him back in time to learn about the dangers of revenge. I have enjoyed all your stories in this series. I hope you'll post another one soon.
Reviewer: clh2o (Signed) · Date: 13/01/10 09:43 AM · On: Sword and Shield
i like this a lot. it a great version of what ek would have done. very well written
Author's Response: Thank you so much. lostatc
Reviewer: lillelouis (Signed) · Date: 05/01/10 09:06 AM · On: Six Gun Quota
Oh goodness!! Just went back to re-read the first few lines of Tempus and noticed something horrifying! I hope I'm not right in my assumtions, but alass, only time will tell....! The horror!!!!! *mimics "The Scream" soundlessly* Moving on.....
Author's Response: Yeah, its all there, if you look, isn't it?
Reviewer: lillelouis (Signed) · Date: 05/01/10 08:59 AM · On: Six Gun Quota
So I figured out after reading Tempus Fugit that the lesson Ben needed to learn had something to do with an obsession. Had an inkling it might be something with revenge. Also (this is gonna sound conceeded) thought I saw some emotional similarities between John and Ben in Tempus. Some of this was probably written black on... err... red in the story and I've just forgotten that I read it, but it stuck for some reason or other :) So Ben's plans are to avenge his mother's death, huh? Seems logical... And the girl he was dating just so he'd have an excuse was actually Heather. Shame. I like Heather. I think she's like him in some way - like Katie too :P But you probably created her that way? Wonderful reader-manipulation there, hun :P Such magnificant writing! So beautifully executed. The emotions are all there, pungent and alive. Wonderful. I think it's oddly satisfying to see Ben from Dean's point of view - the one thing I can't copy or study from you. Trying, but haven't been successfull yet, in creating that overview of how Dean feels about his son and about Sam and his son, without letting it take over the pages. If you know what I'm on about? It's subtle, what you do. Just enough and just the right amounts. Very skillful. Thinking of more to write.... Probably could fill a dictionary, but I'll spare you. Thank you so much for these stories and for thinking of them. I was also wondering about something more personal? If I may ask a favour of you? If yes, mail me and I'll get into it. If not (be it life in the way or other obligations) then thank you again for creating these pieces of art to study and learn from. They help :)
Author's Response: The long review. These always make me smile. You nailed Tempus on the head. There is such an underlying theme about obsession in the show that I couldn't help not making it a theme in my story. A lot of people thought that I didn't like or that I was saying bad things about John in Tempus but I have profound respect for him. The point, though, was to teach Ben a lesson. If Ben is obsessive then who better to possibly knock him out of that obsession than the master of obsession himself. John, in Tempus, never really identified with Ben as truly Dean's son - meaning a son in the same way that Dean and Sam are his beloved sons. And also, he believed that since Ben had come from the future, it meant he was safe in the present so it didn't matter what John did. So John's needs overrode Ben's safety - something that an obsessive mind would say to themselves to justify their actions. I like Heather too and I believe Ben does. He is using her but he's having to have a real relationship with her in order to use her. Unfortunately it takes a lot more maturity than Ben's got at this stage in his life to learn how to love someone more than himself. So his needs/wants/obsessions prevail. She's good girl, Katie too but Ben's still a teenage boy - angelic or not. The key to my writing Ben from anyone's point of view is that Ben is an extension of my own son. Any action Ben gives (other than magical ones, my son hasn't sprouted wings yet) is something that my son has done at some point in his life. Dean and Sam's reactions are reactions that me or my husband have had when my son does those things. The only thing that I can't write with any skill is my son's humor, he's scary he's so funny. So, writing advice, write what's real. Whether its observations of how people interact with each other or how you interact with people, that's the key to writing something that feels subtle and real. I hope the answer you got in my email satisfied your curiousity. I'll happily give you any more information that you want or answer any questions. Thanks for for your reviews and particularly this one. Kim
Reviewer: lillelouis (Signed) · Date: 05/01/10 08:34 AM · On: Six Gun Quota
There was a moment where the whole scene stood out with complete clarity. I could actually SEE Ben stomping upstairs followed by Titus (love the name, by the way). Then I lost it. But it was very, very nice while it lasted :D Lovely story and immensely glad you've chosen to share it with us.
Author's Response: I did a quick scan on the chapter and can I say that I wanted you to be jolted at the end of that scene without sounding conceited? I wanted the reader to be wondering what Ben's up to and to feel as disjointed about the whole thing as Dean and Sam do. As for Titus. Kirsty, my beta suggested it. He's named after a fantastic, heroic character from the HBO show "Rome." Titus is such a large, powerful name in my mind - as is the character in the show and the dog in my story. I hope to one day own one of those dogs. They are bred to defend livestock from lions in South Africa. Huge and loyal. And there is nothing, nothing, nothing better in the world than a boy and his dog. Thanks for reading! And the reviews. Kim
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